Hi
My name is Chris, I am 31 & would say that I have a desire to gamble, I have battled with gambling for nearly 15 years now, started off small on fruit machines & that consumed my life, stopped for a few years, got divorced & lost more money in that than I have ever lost on gambling mind, big lossess, big wins but all in all down as most of us are, I have a great job & work hard to get the things in life that I want, well paid by today's standards, have a beautiful Fiance, own my own house, drive a brand new car but yet I still feel the need to gamble, recently I have been up to the tune of £3000, however over the last few days that has gone down to £600, I spend allot of time on the road and motorway service stations coupled with online gaming being so accesible make me feel that it is just everywhere, I have been saving up for Las Vegas ironically, flights booked & paid for, hotel booked & paid for, just spending money and that £3000 was the spending money, I will have enough saved up when I go & when I am around my fiance I am controlled and conservative about the gambling.
I am not in denial and I know that I have a problem, I need to have some insight into how others broke the habit of a lifetime, stress is a trigger for me but for the past 2 weeks It has been everyday without fail with the odd exception that I go for a frew days, think the habit is broken but then I am straight back in front of a screen, I won £2500 on a single spin the other day, 3 hours later I was £400 down, this is a snapsot of what my life has become these days and I want change, I am getting married next year and luckily that money is safely tucked away, do I gamble due to bordem or do I gamble for the buzz, either way it is really starting to affect me.
I know I probably never meet any of you but anyone that wants to chat or give me advice would be welcomed.
🙂
Hi Chris, welcome to the forum. I am relatively new to the site however like yourself I have had a gambeling problem since I was 18. I am 30 next year. I am a action gambler. I have nice things in life however I find myself not happy with what I have. I want more in my life. I then end up placing bets dreaming of a half decent win. This never happens as I am never satisfied with the money I do end up winning. I then loose all the winnings and then end up in more trouble and occur more stress trying to win back what I have lost. I love the buzz of a gamble but when I am in the high of my addiction I don't care and I zone out from the gamble for that moment of madness with no cares for the cash I am loosing. Reality hits I walk outside and think was this just a bad dream?
I know slow money is more money and gambeling is not a way to cut corners.
Payday is soon lurking for me however I feel in a great place right now and that heading to a dirty bookies to pump money into a place that will beat me up chuck me around for a short time then hang me out to dry is not an answer for me.
My advice would be to keep that £600 and save it for something nice. Get one over on the bookmaker before its to late.
Best of luck at becoming gamble free sir.
Guys, we cannot win because we cannot stop!
Rule of thumb is to break your Time-Money-Location triangle in the 1st instance (taking 1 away removes the ability to gamble) then get help to determine why you gamble! I was an action gambler & for months refused to accept that there may be other reasons than just getting rich that drew me to it. Now I understand that gambling isn't so much about the money! @ the moment, you sound like you both have pots to p1ss in, if you don't figure out recovery now & fast, you will be back here down the line wishing you had! This is a progressive addiction & I'm not talking jackpots...Our stakes get bigger the more we chase & our lives get smaller!
Time to start living - ODAAT
Both, thanks for replying - feels like there are other people out there as well, which sounds stupid as it is what this website is for, that £600 is safe & not going anywhere, action Gambling sounds like the bug that has me & your right I do have a pot to P**5 in 🙂 - Stakes have got bigger and winning the money is not the satisfaction - ODAAT is a great way of approaching it - I am up early this morning and away all weekend with my fiance, I am with her and we are going to go for a bike ride and a long walk to change what we do over the course of a weekend to try and break that location and time factor!!
I will let you know how I get on 🙂
Keeping busy is a really good idea but the best bit about that reply is the 'we'...That suggests to me that she knows & is being supportive which is fab! But I fear 'controlled & conservative' won't work...From what I have read, once we cross the line to compulsive, very few people go back to social gambling. If you want to beat this addiction & you must, you will need to quit. What are you actually gambling for? Is it to get rich (like I thought I was)? You need to ask what riches has it actually bought you in those 15 years. I don't know why I gambled...like you, I had money & no win was ever enough because I stuck it all straight back & more, if not immediately then the next opportunity. I was permanently broke, taking out loans, new credit cards, remortgaging & recovery has given me a chance to live rather than just exist.
Assuming she isn't a partner in crime, can you hand over control of your money to her, just until you get strong enough to resist the urges?
There is blocking software available to prevent online gambling (K9 is free but Gamcare will be able to advise you on the paid versions) & this is highly recommended after self excluding from any accounts that you have.
Soz if this all sounds a bit deep! I feel as though this could have been a chapter in my life had I had the sense to come looking for help sooner & I don't want you kidding yourself that gambling provides anything other than 'entertainment'.
Whatever your reasons for gambling, you have a hell of a lot more for living - ODAAT
Thanks - does not sound deep sounds sensible - I started orignally to make money as i think most gamblers do - have had somw ridiculous wins and spent that on things but your right I have to quit. My pact to myself is to avoid putting myself in those positions, she knows I have previously had a problem.
I may look into the software as again it is the temptation, your words have resonated and your right there is more to life than gambling so each day I am going to approach it by doing something different and something to pre occupy myself to relieve that bordeom, thats essentially what it boils down to, I am not bored I just think I am as gambling gets in the way of all o the other stuff that i should be filling my days with - love the ODAAT and thats the mantra I am going to adopt!
Gamcare offers counselling Lenovo, why not take advantage of it?
There's also the likes of Gamblers Anonymous and other support groups
Might not be everyone's cup of tea but if your struggling what have you got to lose?
tri
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
