Hi all, I'm new to this so unsure how it goes.
Ive had a gambling problem for the last 3 years. It's got to the point where my pay day loans were paid off along with credit cards, but then id end up taking them back out when i was feeling depressed or had something going on. I used gambling as a distraction, started off small but then got out of control and just didnt know what to do.
I tried to hide it from my partner because i was afraid of what she would think of me and what she would do.
I'm just asking for some advice of how to control it or how youve taken control.
Iv'e self excluded myself from online sites and put blocks on my phone but i always end up going back to it.
I'm admiting i have a problem and need help.
Hi Rob25,
Welcome to the Forum!
You have taken some good steps forward, like self-exclusion, putting blocks on your phone and admitting that you have a problem. They are first good steps. You say that you still go back to gambling.
Strategies, like self-exclusion and blocking can be very helpful while you are trying to stop gambling, they don´t make you stop though and stopping is a journey. Think about what has worked and what you can improve to help yourself stop. For example, if you open new accounts, you may want to look into cutting yourself off access to money to gamble with. Someone may be able to manage your money for a while, but this requires you to talk to them and let them know about your problem.
There is a lot of support available to you, like GA meetings or face to face counselling. You can call the Helpline on 0808 80 20 133 or contact the Netline http://www.gamcare.org.uk/support-and-counselling/frontline-services/netline to speak to an advisor in person. Our services are open from 8 am to midnight every day.
I hope that you will find this Forum helpful, too.
Kind wishes
Gabriele
Hi Rob
You should be very proud that you have realised you have a problem and need professional help. That is a very good place to start. I am not the best person to speak to as I am the wife of a gambler who is still (after 80K - 100k) in denial about the problem. Read around the site, it's a fantastic place for support.
Stick with it, be positive and take one day at a time. A huge well done to you for coming here.
Hey Rob and welcome to the forum :))
Youv'e hit the nail on the head when you ask " How to control it " and that's the key we need ! .
I'd gambled for many years (at least 40 ) and had alway's been reasonably ok until the Fobt machines in the bookies came along , then all hell broke loose and I just couldn't stop no matter what .
My only real advice would be in order to not go back to your old way's " Just let it go " admit to yourself that gamblings beat you and youve had enough of the beatings ! It sounds simple but if you also accept your past losses as gone for good then there's no reason to take gambling on again is there ? .
I struggled with the losses part at times and it would always make me want to have one last punt to try and get my money back or to get even but it just restarted the fire all over again , you could alway's flip it slightly if you can't bear the thought of losing it by saying to yourself that " If I was seriously i'll and the cure was however much youv'e lost to date ? , wouldn't I happily pay that sum to know I was going to be better for the rest of my life " ? So well done , youv'e just bought your cure for gambling and it's money well spent ! .
It's more about the fear of letting go of something that's been in your life for quite a while I think , It's like when your a kid learning to swim and youve done all the swimming lessons but you just wont let go of the last float , it's only when you find the courage to kick away that you realise you can swim and youre actually alright without the support , just as you'll be ok without the support of gambling in your daily life :))
Stay safe my friend
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