Hi guys,
I've Just signed up with the intention to document my recovery and also to hopefully to motivate others on there journey, a little bit of background info I'm 31M and have struggled with compulsive gambling for the best part of a decade, I've experienced some of the lowest lows and deepest shame in my life because of this.
During lockdown I have done some soul searching and have come to the conclusion that life is short and we only get one chance on this earth, I can't let my gambling addiction ruin it and define me as a person.
I've had numerous big wins over the years but like any all compulsive gambler they where followed by even bigger losses and regret, my personal vice was always sports betting and as daft as it sounds I would have even described myself as somewhat skilled, I studied hundreds of hours over the years reading about the bookmakers vig/juice, implied probabilities, bankroll management and many other methods that I thought I needed to know.
All of this would have stood me in good stead for life as a professional gambler the only problem is I have this disease and as soon as I gamble my mind cannot comprehend or control my actions, I would then proceed to chase losses and behave like an absolute degenerate knowing that this sort of behaviour is why I blow every think I have every single time, I've spend a full months wages the day I got them before going back to work the following day, I've chased losses and bet £1000 a spin on roulette trying to get back what I've lost and I don't even want too get started on the problems this has caused in my personal life and relationship I'll leave that for another post.
The moral of the story is I am a gambling addict and every single person that has signed up to GamCare has done so for a reason, so please believe me and don't kid yourself not just a £10 accumulator on Saturday afternoon, not just football or your sport of choice and please don't kid yourself and say when I've spent what's in my pocket I'm done. We are all the same and it will slowly pull you back into that world that strips everything good from your life and fill you with anxiety and regret.
Find your why whether it's your family, friends or even because you do deserve it. There is a happy and fulfilling life out there and as I said we do only get one.
I have been in successful recovery December 17th 2020 not without urges, but day by day life is slowly getting better, I wish you all luck.
Hi CT Reewired
Well done for posting and welcome to the forum . The forum is a great place to see other people's stories and to write your own and keep a recovery diary and a great place where people can support and motivate one another.
Brilliant that you have gone since December 17th 2020 without gambling , it's good to set goals but also important to not be hard on ourselves if relapses do happen .
Please feel free to contact the GamCare Helpline on 0808 8020 133 or Netline to explore the additional support available to you. We are available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week if you would like to talk to one of the GamCare HelpLine advisers.
Stay strong and keep posting and supporting other members .
Kirk
Forum Admin
Hi there, I am new yo here also! Only did Gamstop on Tuesday. Been trying to do it for years. Gamcare have been brilliant as have beacon counselling.. After 7 years it so strange to not wake up and gamble!! But I feel a huge sense of relief! Now to try and forgive myself, hope that friends can forgive me for what I have put them through, emotionally and financially!
Your story is one I can relate to so well and agree with everything you say. I wish you continued success and a rich and full filling life ahead ?. Thank you so much for sharing!
Thanks for the comment I’m pleased my story resonates with yours, I would say the single most helpful step I have taken was signing up to Gamstop.
thanks again and good look with your recovery.
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