Shameful newbie

Welcome. You can get strong from this point on, you can do this. tara2

That’s what I plan to do thank you for your words of encouragement I hope you are cracking the problem too 🙂

Hi adelelou look for some outside help, GA, gamcare counselling. Keep busy, learn something new or go back to old hobbies. Hand over finances to your partner, limited access or none, to money will help.

Hi Adele

You are in good company- we all fell into the same trap. Its good that your partner is on board too. Read this forum- allocate an hour a day (thats what i do) and read everyones storys- there are people in a much worse position than you who have lost literally everything. There are also many many success stories, i am 490 days gambling free now but at my worst was 70k in the hole. I will be debt free July 2019, from now until then i still have to watch my kids have hand me downs- less presents, rewards and less treat days out. My little boys 5th birthday is coming up next week and i have to explain to him why he cant have a party. This is the pain and guilt i live with every day. However it gets easier, you learn to appreciate the finer things.

You can do this! you can never be as low as you are now- the only way is up.

Good luck

Day 1 for me and my situation like must here is very similar to yours so your not alone and be proud that you have made the choice to stop ! So you journey has already begun we have to hit this rock bottom to realise. Stay strong

Good first steps Adele, today is day 2 for me so like others have mentioned you certainly are not alone. I won’t gamble today and will worry about making the same commitment tomorrow. Gambling has never provided anything positive, it’s not capable of doing so and therefore isn’t worthy of our attention.

I've self excluded myself from literally every provider I can find online today. Usually I feel stressed if I don't have a bet but I feel relived today like it's over and it's time to move on ! I know I/we will have good days and bad days but we can beat this and already have started our new more positive journey

I started last week, fell off last night, so today is day one, self excluded, run every penny I want to spend past my hubby for now and have a referral through gamcare for counselling. He has rapid cycling bipolar disorder so luckily for me he understands the impulse and addiction side and is totally inboard with getting his wife back. He spent a long time thinking I was having affair! The guilt and shame is keeping me from thinking about it for now. I just need to channel all that gambling energy into something else. I am determined, but also realise its one day at a time. I am on here every 5 minutes at the moment. If I am scrolling through stories I am not trying to gamble. I am combating the anxiety I have been getting by talking to my husband alot, just how I feel etc. I know it won't be easy but am trying to put everything on place to help keep me strong!

You can do this and I'm on here every 2 minutes so far lol just finding people to talk to and keep busy .... stay strong we will beat this together !! You are not alone !!

12 days gf for me and being on here is helping loads. Girlfriend has blocked access to the internet on my phone and has to unblock certain sites I need to like this one lol.

Stay strong.....stay gamble free 🙂

A good thing that I can advise you guys to do to help you is that EVERY MORNING you log on here and read a few stories. It fortifies the mind to NOT gamble. Good luck. One day at a time.

Hi jackdaniels , Iv seen you comment on other stuff , what was your moment you knew you had to stop ?? When did it click , my partner is close to losing us all, and even now he's still refusing crisis counselling , he has a counsellor he sees , for 8 months now , but he is still gambling , since then he has done about 5k that I know off , I have help via Breakeven , it's made me see clearer , yet I tell him I fail to see how his counselling is helping when he is still doing it , then lying about it ? So I don't think that's working , he's telling me I'm trying to make him jump through hoops , it's not the case , j am so desperate for him to see he's better than this and beat it , I'm so done with it now , I want to end it , I feel like the last 5 years of my life have been a lie , and every good moment we have had , it has always been over shadowed by this c**P , by more debt , even when we got engaged , he tried to tell me that a £400 phone bill was when he didn't turn date roaming in when we were in Rome , that was years ago now but just one example , our baby is now 1, I feel like Iv had a bombshell every 3-4 months , and that has made me so angry that he's spent time away from his baby to concentrate on this , j got help as he would always tell me I was crazy and I needed help, I used to get angry and hit out at him which I'm not proud of but it was the only way I could Cope, finding a secret bank account with pay day loans attached done it for me when she was 2 months and he then decided himself to take himself off for Couselling , yet the same s**t keeps happening , I'm desperate now , I know if I finish with him he will be forever angry at me and hate me , Iv told him he is backing me into a corner , Yet he's telling me till he's blue in the face that he does want to stop and he is getting help, but he refusing any other type of help, he's also telling me his life doesn't allow him to not carry his cash card , or deal with limited amounts , seems like another smoke screen , yet when j tell him this suddenly I'm the one who is causing him anger , I'm the one not letting up , when he's telling me he's getting help , I would have thought with the crisis he is in at the minute with us that he would be on the phone to his counsellor getting himself seen , yet he's not even doing that , I'm starting to hate him when I love him so much ,