Taking the first steps

Welcome and well done on taking the first steps. 

First things first, make it impossible for you to gamble. Gamstop Gamban bank blocks. Do everything you can now whilst you are motivated, that way when you do feel the need, you can’t. Urges can be pushed aside. You just need to notice them and take action. I took up reading, doing jigsaws, walking, playing games, anything to keep to distracted. 

Have a plan for money, start trying to save, no matter how small. It became my new addiction. Finally getting some money I could use for myself was amazing. 

Be as open and honest as you can with partners, family, and friends. Their support can be huge. 

Finally, read everything in here. You’re not alone and there’s some great help in here. Write down how you feel now and revisit that when you are struggling. Nothing like reading how low you once were to stop you going back.

Stay strong 💪 

Hi Bonalina

Wierdfish has given you some really good advice and building a foundation of friction to your next bet is incredibly important to stop you as much as possible doing that. 

If you can get some accountability with someone either looking after your money or at least seeing over it then that helps. Connection also helps. Talking through things with people, either friends or family and this community. Going to GA meetings whatever works for you. There is a text only chatroom on here each night at 8pm full of people to support and help you. Click the talk to someone link on here and the advisors are amazing, either text only or on the phone. They can help you get counselling free of charge if you need it.

I've written over 50 daily topics on here, all under film titles so they are easily found in the forum under the recovery diaries section. They are written from my own experiences and might just help. 

Good luck and if you post on here with any questions I promise I will help if I can buddy. 

Thanks for the comments and advice, I have registered with GameStop and put the 5 year auto renewal option on, I’ve already started getting emails from online casinos saying my account has been closed which is good. I’ve looked at blocker apps but am not really sure how they work (not great with tech) I am on day 3 of no gambling. Still feeling awful am hoping each day things will feel slightly better. I am planning on joining the chatroom tonight as well. Also when I have some more time I’m going to read through other posts on the forum. Sadly my parter is not speaking to me and can’t even look me in the eye. I know I’ve hurt him more than I probably ever could I just hope over time we can rebuild what we had. For now I am giving him some space and time to get his head around this 

@g3uowr6i2a Hi Bobalina.

Welcome to this site. To add to the above responses, I would also add Gamban just in case you try to use any of those overseas dodgy sites. It was these that aided my two lapses last year. Thankfully, I was given the free link for Gamban by the Gamcare team on here and then downloaded the app onto my phone and iPad. I have not gambled since.

You mentioned that you are going to read as many diaries as possible on here also. I believe this is a really good thing to do. Not only does it show you that there are many others in a similar position to you but also, you may be able to get ideas from us on how we are managing our abstinence.

I am sure your partner is feeling very upset, hurt and frustrated right now. Just put yourself in his shoes to try to understand why he may be feeling this way. Giving him space is good for him to think things over alone. The best you can do right now is to continue to be open and honest with him. Nobody likes to be lied to. It only increases trust issues further down the line.

Take a read over my diary under the heading - April Fools (there is lots of it)!🥴.

I wish you well and look forward to following your journey on here 🙏.

Take care.

Pink Lady 🩷🍎

Hi Pink lady, thanks for the response. I’m now almost 5 days with gambling. I tried downloading the blocking software but it stopped me getting into normal apps such as my mobile app. So I had to remove, I’m going to take another look over the weekend. I’ll definitely give your diary a read, thank you.

in regards to my husband I don’t know what’s going to happen in the future I know he’s furious at the amount of money I’ve lost, but he’s also said he wants to stay and help me through it. I just hope I can do enough to prove I’m serious and try to make amends for what I’ve done. I know it’s going to take a long time and recovery will last forever but I’m determined no matter how long it takes I will clear the debts I’ve run up and start to save back the money I’ve lost. I’m not going to let this beat me 💪 

@g3uowr6i2a You sound positive and determined going forward to distance yourself from gambling day at a time and well done for getting those first few days out of the way - often the hardest 👏👏👏.

Take it easy and if you find things are getting on top of you/you feel overwhelmed, remember, take a step back and just breath.

Look after yourself and hope you have a peaceful weekend 🙏.

Pink Lady 🩷🍎.