Hi all I am a new member to this group so please be patient with me Đ²Â˜Ñ” I signed up yesterday but only figured out how to post today, me and technology really don't mix!
Okay so here it goes...
I am here to stop gambling for good! Well atleast try my down right hardest to. I am a mum of three beautiful children who deserve better than me, well that's what I think at the moment. I am a compulsive gambler and I have wasted over 11years of my life to this horrible illness. i have racked up over £5000 worth of debt on cc, pay day loans, overdrafts etc.. you name it I have don't it but the worst of it all is I used my partner's card to accumulate some of this debt as well. I feel disgusted in myself as it has impacted the whole family!
I had my first counselling session in the Wednesday just gone and it has helped a little but I have a long road ahead. I am going through the motions right now. Guilt is a big factor but also self hate, worry, anger and just feeling like this tunnel of gambling will never come to an end. I am currently trying to use a blocking software but with no joy. I can't afford the ones you have to pay for at the moment son tried the free ones with no avail. I have £6 to my name but I am determined to beat this with all the strength I have left which isn't much but with your help guys I know I can do it. Thank you for reading my post x
Try to stay strong mum of 3! I lost 1000 two days ago and 1700 9 days before that! With me its bookies! For the next few days is the hardest after a big loss but then it fades but at the same time it's like your brain changes into thinking it's ok to have a little bet again! When you think these thoughts it's best to remember the time you lost and how you felt! This addiction is the worst and so evil! All I can say is stay strong and know that there is millions around the world like us fighting this addiction. Good luck
Thank you so much walk on water Đ²Â˜Ñ” I play the online slots which are the devil! It doesn't even feel like real money though when I'm playing and as daft as it sounds I'm always chasing that one big hit. I have gotten myself into a right mess and now is the lowest in have been. My brain is telling me to gamble but it comes in waves which is awful. I have Bipolar effective disorder and Ocd and i really didn't want to except my condition. I feel as though enough is enough now and need to get my life back on track and enjoy life x
Hi and welcome to the forum.
In your original post you mention "debt". For me this was a major issue that when sorted it took some of the pressure away.
If you are struggling to pay the monthly instalments consider giving stepchange a call.
Try not to brush off any requests for money as it will only get worse.
Perhaps a visit to your GP and speaking with Gamcare re counselling can help you.
I wish you well
Yeah Myself I suffer from depression and anxiety! With me I think I,am in control but that split Second then it's like the devil takes over me! And I will either walk out evens and be happy or lose everything I got! I been doing this for over 20 years and one I can for sure say now is that we can NOT stay in control! Those signs saying "gamble responsibly" is the biggest illusion EVER! And I believe the people behind the gambling industry know this and pray on the weak like us! It makes me sick and so angry when I think about it! Make no mistake a full on gambling addiction is HELL! You can,t beat the buzz of having a nice one on the slots for you and the roulette in bookies or nice win on a horse for me but the feeling of a big loss is the worst feeling ever! For me I don,t want to be around anyone after a big loss and this is hard for me as my girlfriend lost her mum 3 months ago and is still grieving and I am not there for her as I should be! You see this is the other side of a big loss the fact it affects other people who you love! As i said pure hell! You might think I,am crazy but I believe now it's like a demon inside me just waiting for that moment of weakness to come out and attack me! When I walk out of the bookies skint and all sweating and heart pumping and thinking shell I just jump in front of a car now as I,am sick to death of the cycle repeating itself! But I still got that glimmer of hope I can fight this demon but the hope gets lighter and lighter each time I relapse!
Hi.I'm not here to hide so my name is Tim.
I am new to this site and have literally only just logged in. this is the first chat string I have clicked on and every comment reflects what I do and how I feel exactly.
I have been addicted to Gambling for the past 10 Years and although I kid myself most of the time that I only lose what I can afford . this is a rubish statement.
I am 43 years old renting a house with my wife and two buitifull kids. and am 16000 in debt. most of which is down to gambling. Once again I said to myself , as did momof3 that I will never do it again. ( I lost another £20 earlier Today) ((won 60 and lost the lot)), that i will never do it again.. I have spent the last hour banning accounts I have open.. but there always seems to be new ones if you look hard enough.. I hope I do better this time as the best I have acheived in recent times is about 4 weeks without gambling..Sorry for the long inttro. just nice to get it out there and I wish all that have posted the strength and conviction to beat this affliction. ( and I do think of it as a disease) Come on guys lets get our lives back !!!!.
Thanks.
Hi guys I'm back Đ²Â˜Ñ” had a bit of a wobble at the weekend but have told myself Rome wasn't built in a day.
As I go about my day the silliest things will trigger this god forsaken urge! Tv adverts or the familiar tune of a slot machine online game. It's as if this little voice in my head is pushing me to just bet that few quid over and over again! Now I look at it this way now, I have two choices either waste long days fretting over the what its or go and just enjoy a life free from gambling. I had a counselling session today which helped a lot! I have self excluded from all the book makers and arcades in my area also. Just wish I had the courage to do this sooner! It makes me a little more positive for the future of my children, partner and I.
Tim thank you for being honest Đ²Â˜Ñ” the illness we have is curable but only we can put the final nail in the coffin so to speak. Than you for sharing with us as I know it takes a lot of courage to admit we have a problem. We can help each other beat this with a little hope and an hour at a time x
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