A thought a day...to keep me away.

22 Days GF, but still two more days until I can exhale. These last three weeks have been mental hell, not the stopping gambling, but the financial worry and stress I have placed myself and my family under. I am never ever heading back to this dark place that i sit in now !!

Hi - well done, Im not far in front of you with day 29 days today and it was payday for me yesterday - I was fine - paid some bills and debts. My brain is thinking differently and I feel so much better - Im never going back there - Ive been keeping busy these last 29 days and doing normal things - to be honest I do not know how I had the time to sit there and play those awful slots for hours and hours at a time. Regardless of the money lost and the debt (which can be cleared with time) you can never get those lost hours, days, weeks months that it has added up to back. Life is precious and we never know what is around the corner so spend it with loved ones/friends and enjoy life instead of stressing over money lost etc., best wishes x

Anon100 wrote:

Hi - well done, Im not far in front of you with day 29 days today and it was payday for me yesterday - I was fine - paid some bills and debts. My brain is thinking differently and I feel so much better - Im never going back there - Ive been keeping busy these last 29 days and doing normal things - to be honest I do not know how I had the time to sit there and play those awful slots for hours and hours at a time. Regardless of the money lost and the debt (which can be cleared with time) you can never get those lost hours, days, weeks months that it has added up to back. Life is precious and we never know what is around the corner so spend it with loved ones/friends and enjoy life instead of stressing over money lost etc., best wishes x

So so true Anon100.

I had an hour or two to kill in a one horse town earlier, well one horse, two bookies.

I took my Kindle and walked in the opposite direction of the bookies, and sat and read until it was time to leave.

Small win, but a win nevertheless as i have left that two bob town skint on many occassions in the past.

It is all about making yourself busy, making goals and getting things done......weird as it is im champing at the bit for pay day so i can get things paid!

I too have my brain thinking differently and really am starting to feel envigorated 🙂

Thanks for taking the time to comment.

Skyblueblue

Hi SBB , It's always good when we see our mindset changing and begin looking forward to doing things other than gambling , do whatever you need to do on a daily basis to stay safe as every day Gamble free is a real winning day as far I'm concerned:)).

Congratulagtions on getting the first 3 weeks under your belt , there always toughie's and it wont be long before hitting that first month .

Best wishes Alan

ALAN 135 wrote:

Hi SBB , It's always good when we see our mindset changing and begin looking forward to doing things other than gambling , do whatever you need to do on a daily basis to stay safe as every day Gamble free is a real winning day as far I'm concerned:)).

Congratulagtions on getting the first 3 weeks under your belt , there always toughie's and it wont be long before hitting that first month .

Best wishes Alan

Alan thank you - I like that 'every day i dont gamble is a winning day'....Im going to make that my mantra 🙂

Skyblueblue

What a horrifically nerve wracking month.

The temptation of gambling was not too much of a challenge as I had self excluded from everywhere and more, and having blown all my cash anyway couldnt have even if the desire had been there.

What has been killing me is the fact I spent money that was not mine to spend, and I have been living in terrible guilt and worry.

Where my head was i will never know, but it was the catalyst for at last admitting defeat and seeking help.

By good fortune or the grace of something or someone far bigger than myself, i have been spared and have settled my debt, and can breathe again.

I really would have lost everything, and despite knowing that, i still chose to gamble with not only my life, but those of my wife and kids - what a low life desperado i have become.

However nearly four weeks on, i feel so much better and with that obvious weight off my shoulders now feel even more envigorated and focussed.

Today being pay day, i would normally have been playing online slots by now, instead i have paid every bill and fulfilled every obligation and it feels really amazing.

There is not much left, but a clean November (which it will be), will allow a peaceful, relatively financially stress free Christmas with my loved ones.

I appreciate that i am on the early stages of my journey and wont get complacent, however I am a very blessed guy, with so much love around me, i feel released from prison and am going to appreciate every special moment and going to try to make up for as much lost time as possible.

Have a strong day everyone!

Sbb

Over the moon with how I am beginning to feel, im winning by not gambling.

Stress free weekends and quality time with people that matter.

Stay strong folks.

Hi Skyblueblue, wow! Just read your diary from the beginning and a MASSIVE well done to you! That feeling of being able to breathe in a morning, makes not gambling so worth it! You stay strong, keep your family tight and enjoy the ready of you weekend. Take Care cx

Charley1 wrote:

Hi Skyblueblue, wow! Just read your diary from the beginning and a MASSIVE well done to you! That feeling of being able to breathe in a morning, makes not gambling so worth it! You stay strong, keep your family tight and enjoy the ready of you weekend. Take Care cx

Thank you Charley1, I am finding great strength from reading about everyone elses successes, tools and techniques.

I am feeling so much stronger and cant believe that when I wake on Saturday morning i will be 1 full month gamble free.

I realise now how much of a fool I have been, and am very blessed to still have what I have.

Having really gone to town on my debts this month, its going to be a financial struggle, but I cant see anything breaking this positivity.

Sbb

SBB - just wanted to say well done on making such a positive change in your life. You sound like you really have it in you to carry on this great progress. I haven't gambled for the last week, and take real inspiration from the posts of people like yourself. Keep up the good work my friend.

Al

With my new found time on my hands, I have produced my 'Fifty Words of Wisdom', suppose its part of my healing, an opportunity to remember what is important in my life.

I share it in the hope some of them may ring true for you and in some way help you focus on your goals a little more.

1. Time is the most valuable commodity on the planet, and we all have it in equal amounts. It’s how we spend it that matters. Spend it with people who make your heart sing, spend it with those people who would break your heart if they were not around.
2. Too much of one thing normally means not enough of another. If you are spending too long at work, too long on in the pub or too long on the golf course, it means that not enough of your time is being spent elsewhere. In the end you will miss wonderful moments you can never get back.
3. Really appreciate people, and savour every moment with them. One day sadly you will find they have gone.
4. We are all exactly the same, colour, religion, location, age, size and shape may label us, but we all came from the same place and will return there.
5. Empathy, Love, Compassion, Forgiveness, and Respect are paths to contentment. When we wander off these paths or someone blocks our way, we make bad decisions which hurt us deep inside.
6. School is really is the best time of your life. The ability to learn is a wonderful gift, as is the art of teaching and passing on knowledge. It’s a microcosm of evolution itself, it is the survival of the fittest so grab every piece of knowledge that you can.
7. Read a book every month. It takes you to places you have never been and may never go to. It introduces places that you may end up travelling to. It offers insight into different lives and thoughts, situations and cultures, people and times. It shows us what it is to be humans.
8. When you feel something is wrong, it almost every time is wrong…the sooner you understand and act on this the better.
9. When you feel something is right, it isn’t always the case…follow the feeling until it feels wrong.
10. It’s hard to walk away from trouble, but it really is less painful in the long run. Long term grudges or vendettas eat away at the soul. Lashing out may hurt you as much, or more than the other person, and tends to mean lawyer’s fees and fines.
11. Travel whenever possible, the places with the least to offer materialistically always offer far more spiritually.
12. Feel every emotion and learn to enjoy each one for what it is…..part of the wonder which is life.
13. Be brave! Tell that girl she is beautiful, ask for a pay rise (if you know you deserve it), …….Fortune does favour it!
14. Be wary of those who don’t drink. They remember the next day, and take great joy in reminding you and telling others about things you cannot.
15. Great Britain is the best little place in the world. We have a rich history of invention, we have four very different seasons, our scenery is up there with the best and our beer hits the spot.
16. Some people are needy and selfish, it’s not something they are necessarily aware of or can alter. If you have the energy give them your time, if you don’t have, walk away politely.
17. If someone enters your mind, take a moment to email, call, text, snapchat or what’s app them and ask them how they are! Knowing we are not alone is a fundamental need, and letting someone know you care costs nothing at all.
18. Make lists, have goals, prioritise them and do everything you can to achieve them however big or small. There are not many better feelings than a sense of purpose and a sense of achievement.
19. Aim high, think big, it is all possible…but you have to visualise it and believe it possible!
20. Dance – Dance even if no one else is, Dance in the rain, Dance in the light, it’s your song that’s playing right now.
21. All 7.5 billion of us exist on a speck of dust which is revolving around a slightly larger speck of dust at 67,000 miles an hour in an indefinable space without any control over our destiny. Your tiny little life is therefore not that important in the big scheme of things, however every single word you speak and action you take has an impact on others all around the globe, so choose what you say and do very carefully.
22. Friends and Colleagues are important, Family is all. Resolve issues, don’t let them fester. If you have let them fester, resolve them today…there may not be a tomorrow.
23. Eat what you like, when you like. Why would you eat what you don’t like, when you don’t want to?
24. Exercise is healthy but then again so is sleeping, do as you feel – it’s your life and no one can alter that fact.
25. We all make mistakes, and instead of learning from them, tend to repeat them despite the obvious pain they cause. The secret really is listening to yourself before you take action, consider options and probable outcomes wherever possible…..We tend to know how things will pan out.
26. Be good, if you have the time, the skill or the financial means help with no expectation of return…it feels amazing for the giver just as much as the receiver….try it!
27. On each of the 1500 times the average couple make love the man releases 500 million sperm, of which one will connect with one of the 2 million eggs that the woman was born with. That’s odds of 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500 that you are here at all. You are very special – remember that!
28. For you to exist and produce a specific child has odds of 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500 x 500,000,000 x 2,000,000 x 1,500. Children are the most amazing, wondrous things, treat them with love, awe and light them the paths.
29. Today is all that matters. Don’t forget the past, but don’t dwell on it, By all means make plans, but that’s all they are at this stage. Today is the day, today is your day!
30. Slow down and admire the view. A journey gets you from A to B, it is the journey itself that takes time and therefore provides an opportunity to reflect and take stock.
31. However you see yourself and whatever you think of yourself, it’s is a million light years away from how you portray yourself and how others see you. If you are brave enough ask!
32. Everyone has fears and failings, everyone! From the top CEO to mega-rich sportsmen/women and rock stars. They are no better than you, in fact you may well be a better person than they are.
33. Don’t have a dig at your boss, they may frustrate you, but they are generally trying their best in a difficult set of circumstances. Remember the emperor may be wearing new clothes, but the emperor is still the emperor, naked or not!
34. Television is designed to dumb us down. Watching actors and actresses playing out fictional lives in soaps is to stop us thinking about and challenging our own.
35. Break the rules wherever possible. If we all adhered and complied we as a race would not evolve. Challenge what you are told, break the mould, smash through the glass ceilings and if necessary kick down the statues.
36. It’s good to have faith but keep it personal. Organised religion can be divisive, dangerous and thrives on the insecurities of us humans. King Zog of Albania may well have had it right!
37. Karaoke’s should never be held in the same location more than once a year. The same people singing the same songs poorly each week is not what should be viewed as entertainment.
38. People are generally a disappointment, but when someone comes up trumps, it’s worth the wait. Keep believing.
39. One hour of glory may seem worth far more than a week of mediocrity but a week lasts 167 hours longer!.
40. Horror films are not good. They teach us that hatred and evil are acceptable and commonplace. If you need to stay in and watch a movie, choose Shawshank, Green Mile, Elf or It&rs
    quo;s a Wonderful life.
41. Musically the 60s were where it all began, the 70s where it happened and the 80s where it ended.
42. Looks do attract, but it is what is inside that matters, go with the latter if you can’t have both.
43. Don’t marry young, play the field, but sensibly and with respect. Learn to understand yourself and what you like and dislike before jumping in. Marriage is costly emotionally and financially so choose well.
44. Believe. Believe in yourself, believe in your friends and family, believe in humanity, believe in something higher than all of us – they all exist and have limitless possibilities.
45. Look for the good. Everything is made of positive and negative energy, there is bound therefore to be some bad news, but if we all recognise, talk up and celebrate the positive, amazing things happen.
46. Be an agent for change. Everything happens with a first word, or first step be that person that initiates it, you have permission, there is nothing to stop you.
47. Document the moment. Take a picture, write it down…in the years and months to come these records will make you feel alive, whether tears or laughter they will take you right back to the place and time.
48. Tuck a little cash away every month and ensure you take family holidays while the kids are still young enough and still interested, these truly are golden moments.
49. Communicate. Listen as well as talk, question and try to understand….in everything you do!
50. Love. Love yourself, your parents, your children, your friends, your colleagues, even your enemies. John Lennon was right – Love really is all you need!

Totally lost my appetite for sport, and I am not complaining in the sightest......another bill paid.....keeping things lean.

Feeling so so much better 🙂

Sbb

One of the happiest, most content months I can remember.

Not one urge to gamble, successful at work, peace broken out at home, Bills paid, promises kept!

This IS the ONLY way forward for me, no looking back....those dark days are over.

Sbb

Hi well done and love post 26, it's just so great being gf, wished I had seen the light years ago, best wishes to you and your family, stay positive x

Anon100 wrote:

Hi well done and love post 26, it's just so great being gf, wished I had seen the light years ago, best wishes to you and your family, stay positive x

Thank You Anon100 - Its the positive thoughts that are making this work for me, im enjoying the new ride. Stay strong 🙂 x