Daring To Live

Haha Russ, absolutely NOT! Love the Irish, many of my friends are from there. Gorgeous people 🙂

and yes, it’s funny the impact a total stranger can have. He honestly saved me that day. I genuinely could have ended up sectioned and Fighting for my daughter. When I’m writing and remembering I have so many emotions washing over me, they can be so overwhelming, I started shaking whilst writing my last entry. It’s crazy how many times I’ve come so close to ‘rock bottom’ but I don’t think I’ve actually been there yet... and I don’t want to get there. This is REALLY helping.

Thank you again for all your support.

Em x

Hey Boo

The slots are just the worst! 🙁

I too went through a phase of Bingo with a friend and her mum. It wasn't long before I was spending quadruple my books price on the slots in the intervals and after Bingo had finished. Stupid really as bingo is far more restrictive with spending and can make a fun day out but us compulsive gamblers aren’t satisfied with that.

I totally understand the territorial actions/ feelings over machines. I would sometimes have 2/3 machines that were ‘mine’ and even though I can only play one at a time I’d have signs on the others saving them from being played by anyone else. So ridiculous when you think about it.

Today the 3 of us enjoy a beautiful Sunday. This time last week I was shutting my laptop after gambling solidly for 14 hours and losing a fortune. Today I open my laptop with a smile on my face after a full nights sleep (although I watched Annabelle creation) so was scared out of my life ? 

Thanks to everyone here. I’m crawling out of the hole I’ve been in for years and it feels amazing ?

Em x

I made it... bills and wages paid ?

Today I’ve had such a good day. The foggy haze that was filling my head is really starting to disperse. Home from work now and weirdly the happiness I’m feeling is making me want to gamble... What the hell!! Get a grip Em 🙁

I’m launching a new product soon with my business and super excited. Today I was really able to dedicate all my time and energy into making sure we get advertisement right and after securing further investment funding last week I will soon have the cash to properly push it.

the adrenaline is REALLY making me want to gamble but just for today.. I WONT?

Em x

Em, 

that is just awesome. You know how to ride these urges. Fab news about your new product ?

Hi Emily82

I hope you are well and haven’t been here the past few days because you’ve been too busy. 

I was also around when you were last here about four years ago and we were supporting each other back then. I was under a different username then anon1982 - I don’t know if you remember. I’m sad that we both have found ourselves back here after that period of time but we have also come back to the right place to get ourselves back on track which is positive. 

You done amazing during that time and can do that again. Hope you’re okay. 

Lonely/anon1982

Hey,

You're doing very well! Keep the clear head, peaceful heart and soul intact.We all will get through this difficult time.For now we need to aknowledge every little mercy out there...eg. no gambling incidents...That is really positive.Stay safe, committed and be kind to you

S.......xx