Day 1.

Hi Paul,

I can see similarities between us, Although I am a good decade older! 38 now. Lost 8 years of my life. Wasted, deteriorated, drained, washed away. That was then. And wow, what a life you can have back just within 1, 2 years!

Past is the past. This is now. Let's do this... Together.

Wonderful opening, and going to be a great end! No more Bookies, Online Gambling! Just Money for me, my family!

JP.xx

Hi Pete

Thanks for your comment, even if you don't see my reply lol.

I just spent a week in Greece, now back to work and thinking about my next step. New pc is the next step, as it took ages for me to realise that my degree in multimedia was a complete waste of time, simply because I didn't learn the skills I needed to, in order to become an animator. Not the courses fault, it was mine and it's not too late to animate, even if I don't get a job doing it.

I am actually, only a year behind you as I am 37 in September. Would you consider 37...or even 40 realistically, by the time I learn the skills I need to maybe get hired. To be honest, even if I don't get a job being creative, I can still spend my time being creative outside work. There is so much competition out there, that I don't expect to get anywhere, but that's not the point I suppose.

I am however, massively addicted to games, I feel like it's just as bad as gambling in terms of the time I'm losing, I just don't lose any money while doing it. I actually feel like wasted time, is far worse than wasted money.

Well...I'm not doing too badly. Been having a load of urges recently, you know how it is? I just don't know why, but I suppose it's just an urge.

Been a couple of months since I trained, to be honest I have lost a bit of motivation really, feel like I could easily slip but I'm not going to give in that easily. I did download a free poker app, only to find that I was playing a bit too much, so I decided to delete it. I have written a few goals to achieve by the end of the day. Training session, no video gaming, draw and watch a film....relax.

I had forgotten how difficult life is after a holiday, and to be honest I have a pretty easy life.

Well, I'm not posting that often, but thought today would be a good time to. Reached day 195 today, and I had a moment of weakness the other day. I was watching the rugby and started to think I could have a controlled bet. So, I set up a w**********l account, I know it was a stupid decision and I went with it.

After putting in all of the necessary details, I loaded a game up thinking it would be okay. Once the game loaded, I sat and pondered to myself. I just couldn't justify going backwards...so I logged out and cash in my initial deposit, without placing a bet. This is something I could not have done in the past. It really does show, once you have had an addiction, it's so easy to go backwards if we feel weak.

If anything, I know now that I have more willpower, I just hope I can put this mindset in to other areas of my life. Good luck all 🙂

Well done Paul, I keep getting very close to having a bet myself but I stop when I think it will be such a step backwards and I do not want to start at Day 1 again.

That's so true mate. I know we all get the buzz occasionally, so I think temptation is there to remind us why we stopped to begin with. Hope your doing well anyway, I appreciate your comment mate,

Well, it's not been a great month, as I finally gave in and gambled for some reason. I'm not going to go on, saying how I'm going to turn everything around. I'm not even going to talk about the fact I was weak minded and gave in to temptation. I have no ambition, and the ones I had are long gone. I know that the reason I gamble, is because I'm disappointed with myself, I have nothing really that motivates me to do better.

I have no reason to complain about my life.