The only reason I write my diary early is that I get paid tomorrow and usually the first thought is a bet. I usually transfer money into our joint account and then lie about how much wage I got and have about £150 in bets, tomorrow will be different. Determined every day to beat the urges and shake off the feeling of badness and hatred I have for myself.
You will learn to like yourself again over time all the bad feelings will eventually die down....
Not gambling gives you a reason to be proud of yourself.
Perhaps buy yourself a small treat to encourage your recovery, doesn't have to be anything major, perhaps a book you'd like or something nice to eat.
Reward is really important. We kinda have to go back to basics when we get into this way.
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