Been here so many times, i lapsed last week after giving up for 127 days felt great and then on day i thought. I will start a wee bet challange 5 pound and only do the football. yeah so it sounded easy. started winning a bit was up about 400 odd pound thoought this is the game. Then the slump hit and it continued for 3 days and i lost 2300 pound devasted is not the word. I am currently in an amazing relationship with and amazing girl and i have lapsed. shes dosent like me gambling as we are going too buy a house together. I cant keep going like this or i will lose everything. lying too her. i lost eveything i have in my bank and need too lend money too get throught the next month. Today is as low as i have been as i have so much good in my life now. I am starting on day one agin and this time its for good, i have done it before and can do it again. moving forward never back. lick my wounds and stand up too this and fight it. You can never beat the bookies thats for sure. I am sure in a few days time it will get easier.
Ally 1981, sorry to hear about your relapse after you did so well. But you're able to start again, sadly the money is gone now and you need to try and keep that in mind. So many times I tried to 'win' my money back, but I never will because eventually I'd put it all back in! Keep in mind the good you have in life for your strength through the next few days. You are lucky, as you do have good in your life, so keep that close to your heart. Wishing you all the best on your journey through this horrible addiction! Good luck C x
Thanks Charley
for those kind words and support. Your right I won't get my money back and never will. I will start a fresh and hopefully come back stronger. I do have so much more better in my life and it is a horrible association. Once your addicted you don't know when too stop and can't walk away till you have nothing left. Enjoying watching the sport and watching the shocks coming in thinking thank god I am not gambling. Need too move forward an not look back. The past is the past
On day one still thinking over the past few days and how stupid I have been. As I said as the days goes past I will get stronger again and back too where I was before. Before I lapsed I was up at 127 days. Done so good and the wheels came off. Going too keep myself busy and focus on the future. The past is the past. Moving forward don't look back
That's the thought I have every day at some stage how could I have been so stupid but once we start we lose control & cannot stop, so just have to make sure not to place any bet however small as it escalates out of hand so quickly
Life is better without gambling a lot less stressful, so many better things to spend money on
Good luck
It will still be very raw, but try to keep positive (I know easier said than done) Punishing yourself about what had lost won't fix things and may lead to wanting to try and win it back (in my case anyway) so just take one day at a time and take it easy. Great to write in your diary everyday as personally I think it helps keep a check on things and gives you a boost to read other diaries. Hope you have a stress/worry free day. Cx
Thanks for you support rich and charley, this kind words make all the difference. You know your not alone and there is people in the same boat. Day 1 has been good watch sport and not thinking of betting. Love watching sport without a bet. You take the game in better and no stress involved. Hope your days going good guys. Keep up the good work and stay strong
Thanks
Ally
Glad it's going well ally, step by step, day by day and you'll be racking your days back up before you know it. C x
hi half life, thanks for your advice. I only have enough too get bye ever week and my partner saves all the money so i have limited access too the cash. I have blocked myself from all gambling websites and dont plan too come clan too my girlfirend as i dont feel i need too. She hates gambling so no way can i tell her. that makes me more determined too not gamble as i dont want too lose her.
thanks
ally1981
on day 2 feeling so much better today. sorting things out for my finances this month and will get back on track. will take a few days for the feeling of feeling stupid too pass but enjoyed watching sport yesterday hassle feel and most of all stress free. keeping busy today and making dinner for the good lady too come home dont start back work too next monday so keeping buy will be the key and enjoying the football at night. enjoy your day folks stay strong moving forward never back
on day 5, going really well no urges. My feeling has eased regarding my loses and how stupid i have been. Its all gone and nothing i can do about it. focus and motivate towards the future. been watching sports the past few days and seeing alot of shocks and i am thinking too myslef i am glad i am not gambling. Here is too another gf day moving forward never back
Suppose she had a fling that finished and made an equivalent decision not to tell you what you didn't need to know, how would you feel when it came to light? Thinking back over conversations with her, her smiling at you, whilst all along she had been keeping quiet about something pretty major.
It's not the financial loss that gets the OHs, it's the deceit.
CW
Ally / admin.
Apologies as i hit "flag this as abusive" against #13. This is an error on my part.
Best wishes
On day 51 gamble free. Feeling very positive. As much as time goes by and I think at times just a wee coupon on. They I think how many times I got too where I was 7 weeks ago. Moving forward never back. Too end the year gf and start the new year gf will feel good. It's good too be excited about not gaming. Moving in the right direction
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