It's now or never!... 13th May 2018

Day 6

Today I’ve been for an early morning coffee in town with my mum. It’s little things like that, that I enjoy when I’m not gambling.

Overall I’m much a happier person when I don’t gamble. I think we all are.

I’m taking this recovery one day at a time rather than thinking of the long term. The 6th day is the most important of my recovery.

Day 6

Tonight’s film choice is ‘Passengers’. Seen it before but it brings back memories of a great date with my girlfriend in the middle of a long period of being gamble free. Happy times!

So back again to Day 7.

A week clear of my last bout of gambling.

But this time I have to make it count. Very busy today which is no bad thing I suppose.

Thanks, Caughtup. I have to keep strong and positive. It’s the only way to move forward 🙂

Another win for me today!

£1 into my collection jar 🙂

No urges to gamble. Onto tomorrow where the journey continues.

Day 8

I’ve just finished work for the day and I’m now sat in a coffee shop, feeling a bit guilty about spending £2.65 on an iced latte on a nice summer’s day after a hard day at work. Yet I would think nothing of spending £300 on gambling.

It’s been said by many users on this forum before, but that’s how messed up our heads are when we’re gambling.

I’ve been lucky that I’ve had no urges for a few days now. The fact that very little sport is on will have had a big part to play in that.

Because sports bet losses will have lead to online casino losses.

I know it’s very early days yet and I aren’t for one minute resting on my laurels. Those urges WILL come eventually.

It’s how I manage them that matters the most.

Currently I’m finding ways to manage my time in which I would have been gambling.

Having read many, many diaries on this forum, I think I have to admit to myself that I haven’t hit what people would call ‘Rock bottom’ yet. I somehow have a knack of stopping myself about half way down the imaginary hole.

I do enough damage to set me back a couple of months, but I’ve never done myself any long term damage from gambling. I’ve only ever lost £300/£400 at a time (of savings). But it’s been enough to hurt and depress me for a period of time.

I fear that this is partly why I have never found a way in the past to give up gambling completely.

I’ve been doing lots of thinking over the last 8 days and one of those questions has been ‘Why I’ve never managed to stop gambling?’

I feel stronger this time around with the extra blocks in place and with the girlfriend having access to my bank account. She checks it both weekly and randomly to ensure that I’m on the straight and narrow.

So Day 8 and I’m feeling more positive about my recovery this time.

Excellent progress Dan. I admire your attitude which shows honesty, courage and a good sense of humour.

It can be a difficult road to travel.Thoughts of a gamble free life can sometimes make us feel sad and before we know it we can be back messing up our lives. Obviously we need to be forever on our guard and be able to fend off, or ignore, intrusive thoughts of gambling.

This is a good a time as any to call time on our crazy behaviour. We're not idiots, neither are we incapable. In fact, we are in in a great position to beat this addiction and get back our freedom. Wishing you every success...stephen

Day 9

Thanks Caughtup and Stephen for your kind and encouraging words.

After some strong urges in the first few days, I can honestly say that gambling is the furthest thing from my mind right now. The very thought of it sickens me to be honest. I know it probably won’t stay like this forever but I hope this feeling contines for a bit longer.

A new day, a fresh challenge.

Will go for a run after work again to keep myself fit. I’ve recently got my girlfriend into running so she’ll probably join me too.

I’m feeling quite fresh and alert which is a far cry from the old gambling me. It’s a nice feeling.

Tuesday 22nd May, let’s see what you’ve got. I’m ready for you!

Day 9

A 5km run completed after work. I ran with my girlfriend, who has only just taken up running, so we completed it in a steady time.

Had my tea, a nice cup of tea and now for a soak in the bath to catch up on some diaries.

Happy days. Feeling goooood!

Great going Dan! Well over a week GF!

Keep it going buddy, you know it makes sense! Those days soon rack up and the good feelings you get from doing this is far more rewarding than any false short-lived euphoria from playing the slots, that’s for sure.

We are living parallel lives. I have started running 5ks with my girlfriend, who also runs at a steady pace 🙂

Day 10

Thanks for your message ukds69. Yes, you’re spot on, I feel a lot prouder and a lot happier about my life currently than I was when I was gambling. I’m seeing things in a clearer light and I’m appreciating the finer things in life, such as precious time with my family and girlfriend. You neglect so many things whilst gambling.

Into double figures today. Another mini milestone reached. Small steps on the long road to recovery. But I’m heading in the right direction.

Day 10, let’s be avin’ you!

Double digits Dan aiming to amend

Running and romancing with his lady friend

Knowing in his heart just where he wants to be

Standing proud and tall in the land of the free

That’s fantastic, Stephen. Thanks for that, I love it! 🙂

Another day fended off.

The journey continues tomorrow.

Lovin’ the gamble free life. Feel so much more relaxed.

Top work sir!

Yeps, this GF life really is the way forward isn’t it? Things are so much simpler, why ever did we need to give ourselves that self inflicted stress in the first place?? But no... that’s all in the past, only look forwards. To a brighter (and richer) future!

Day 11

Another gamble free day? Yes please!

Yes ukds69, I was thinking last night about what gambling does to you. If I win, I’m not really happy about it anymore. Probably because deep down, I know that the money isn’t really mine and that sometime in the (very near) future I’ll be handing it straight back to them. If I lose, and lose badly, then it affects me for days/weeks after. So why do I bother? There’s no real ‘win’ for me!

I used to enjoy sports betting because it gave the matches extra meaning. It added to the excitement. But back in the day, I used to be able to accept a small defeat as a bit of entertainment.

Those days are long gone though.

Whilst I will always say that I’m not quite at full tilt mode where I’d lose the whole lot and then go looking for more, I’m halfway to that situation and I need to nip it in the bud before it got to that stage.

I’m still young enough (31) to have a brighter future.

Here’s to today. Let’s go!...