My worst Birthday....

Hi Dan, I closed my facebook and got them to delete all my data as whatever I did on facebook every advert was gambling. After four months now I have a lot more time and get less aggrivated by them and who needs to spend an hour each day looking at what your friends are doing each day. Once u get to all the blocks in place the only way to gamble is to break those exclusions by going in bookies and hoping they don't realise or going to pubs for the fruit machines which u cant exclude from, bif of a harsh lesson I know but the reality is that you need that will power too, I'm further down the line and the six hundred pounds ive spent on gambling tho y

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This year gas been in pubs and bookies I shouldn't be allowed to use...ie bookies blocks don't work andpubs are everywhere so you have to think when have I ever actually got more money out of a machine and kept it a nd actually put it towards something of use.....and the answer to that if ur like me is never.

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Uve given me good advice over the years when ive been failing miserably so I thought id try and give u a bit of advice. Lets do this together eyadam

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Yes, to be honest Adam, I very rarely use Facebook. I use Twitter more. Mainly to follow certain celebs/sportsmen/women.

But yes, closing them is an option.

Yes, the reason I’ve not really self excluded from bookies in the past is that I’ve heard many people say that it rarely works and you can always bypass the self exclusion.

But I’m going to do it anyway. Whatever happens, I’d be too scared of getting booted out of the shop in front of others.

The journey ahead is going to be tough. The first week is always extremely difficult. But time is a healer.

Thanks Adam, I appreciate your message tonight mate! You’re a good guy.

Don't let your future be dictated by this relapse. Draw a line under it and move on.

Just one day at a time and before you know it you will be way up the gamcare mountain, filling your lungs with all that sweet, fresh, gamble free air.

You know, I know and everybody knows that the time has come for Dan the Man to take back control of his life. I believe you can do this ...stephen

Thanks for your inspriring words of wisdom, Stephen.

After a Sunday spent wallowing in self pity, it’s time to take control of my life and become a fitter, healthier, cleaner version of me.

My goals are to get myself back into running in order to trim up. To sort out my sleeping pattern whereby I achieve at least 7 hours sleep every night. To eat healthier foods. To do more reading at night time and spend less time watching telly before bed time.

Those days will begin to mount up again in no time. I’m confident of that. Today I shall self exclude from all bookies in my area.

That way I can’t possibly think of a way of gambling at all. All avenues will be shut and I can finally move on with my life once and for all. I’m finished with gambling.

One day at a time. Today I will not gamble.

I read a post on here at the weekend about somebody who said they couldn’t get excited about anything apart from their next bet. I forget who said it.

That rings true to my thought process recently.

In the last few months I’ve had so many exciting things in my life including a new phone, a new car, lots of nice things for my house. But nothing excited me.

What is the point in me gambling!? I gamble to win money. Then IF I win some money, I may purchase something in my life that doesn’t really mean anything to me or excite me. I’m more bothered about what to bet on next.

Health is more important than wealth. By gambling, my health is suffering. It’s as simple as that.

Hi Dan, I remember the feeling of gambling dominating and everything else seeming meaningless. You can do this because you deserve to escape from under that black cloud. If you haven't already fo read @Matt24 s diary, a hard read but inspirational Take care S 🙂

Thanks Sharon. Yes, I’ve read Matt’s diary. It’s an incredible read and is a perfect example of someone who has come out the other side from this gambling nightmare. A true inspiration.

As are you. You’ve firmly put your gambling in the past and it’s something that you should feel incredibly proud of.

Dan x

A really tough day at work. It was very tiring having to keep up a front in front of my work colleagues. I’m glad today is over.

I honestly don’t know what I’m feeling at the moment. I’m irritable, yet I don’t want to gamble. I’m just very upset and annoyed at how it’s all panned out. I never thought I’d find myself in the midst of this addiction.

Generally, I don’t hold an addictive personality. I’m anything but actually.

I’m feeling down at the moment but I know I will bounce back from it. I think it’s the fact that it happened on my birthday weekend.

Oh well. I move on. Things will improve.

Another day of struggle. I know that I’ve just got to dig deep and fight past these first 20-30 days for things to feel better.

I think losing 1/3 of my savings in just 24 hours has really shocked me. It’s not like I urgently need the money. All my bills are catered for and I’ve sorted my Christmas presents out. But I just can’t believe the person I’ve become.

I’m so reliable and caring in so many other ways, that’s how people would describe me. They’d be shocked if they knew the truth about this.

Another day without gambling. That’s a positive.

It usually takes us a while before we feel better and then we feel the need to gamble again, if we allways felt this way we would never gamble but we would also be miserable all the time. I feel if u feel really low with the lows its good because you will after u succeed at staying gamble free feel really high with the highs. Onwards we travel, adam

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Hi Dan another day gamble free is another brick in the wall, you're building the foundation of the life you deserve. I read a good article in the guardian about addiction which made alot of sense. Try not to worry about what other people would think, you are doing everything you can to help yourself and deserve to have peace of mind. Take care S 🙂

Thanks for your kind and wise messages, Adam, Sharon.

Yes, it’s all about taking it one day at a time. Especially in the early days of recovery.

I guess in true gambling mode, I just want instant success. Which is not going to happen. The reality is it’ll take months and months to get back the money I lost at the weekend. But, being gamble free for that period of time is far important. I’m already sleeping far better and feel much better within myself.