New and Final Start

Hey,

I am back posting here after another disasterous binge of heavy gambling. 

So since lockdown I mamaged to stay away from betting with all the bookies closed for a few months, then as soon as they opened I was tempted back in..long story short went on an amazing run to the point I cleared all my debt over £25k worth, to a complete disaster last 2 days and I am still left with £13k debt on credit cards, I am hiding from the missus.

Felt sick last night, realising what I had done and how could I do this once again, after having a chance to clear my debts and be stress free, but have to realise I would have lost the money anyway ..as my history shows and I know too well that is the only way it would have ended, feeling like telling my missus but just cant.

Have made a vow to chip away at my debt and when it is down to £3k will confess all to the wife and put all the barriers in place and make a fresh start, hopefully this will take me 8- 10 months, just have to stay focused and disciplined.  8- 10 months is nothing compared to where I could have ended up if I continued.

Any thoughts advise greatly appreciated.

Harry

I am struggling with thoughts of trying to get what I lost back with a very big bet..I know this is madness...please can anyone advice if they have been in the same position 

@harry33 I for one have tried to get everything back with one bet. The trouble was it didn't matter if I won or lost, the outcome was still the same. If I won I thought if only I could get a little bit more then I would stop, but it was never enough. If I lost I felt worse and ended up chasing those losses with more borrowed, loaned or stolen money. 

If you believe you are a compulsive gambler then you will never win with a bet. That's why in GA specifically we say to draw a line under the losses. If you struggle to accept they're gone you'll struggle to move on. 

You can sort out any debts by not gambling. You'll also get back peace of mind, stability, respect and a life. 

I would also urge you to come clean to your wife. Keeping secrets or lying will just make it harder.

Chris.

Hi Harry 33 if you stop now things can only get better, why not get the blocks in place now? Before I signed up to gamstop I couldn't go 24 hrs without gambling and to be honest a win was worse for me and it was never enough my mind would snowball and I would lose what id won plus more. Complete madness and in  my 3months away from gambling I can now see the sickening pattern. I've been going to GA meetings for a good few weeks now and now I'm really starting to learn ! Why not give GA a try ? Something needs to change for you to move forward, good luck I hope something works for you