NEW DAWN , NEW DAY , FEELING GOOD !

He's a sneaky b****r that Mr.G. Good to see self exclusion kept you safe...you probably wouldn't have given in to the urge but taking away the possibility is a win-win as opposed to the lose-lose of gambling. Stay vigilant...the understandable nerves/stress/grumpy old man syndrome of the last week or so might find him whispering in your ear again. But you know not to listen to his false promises. If you're feeling a bit harassed what can you do that will help ease it....what can you do to relax? You've got a lot going on so remember to be kind to yourself. Rambling on here is better than gambling for sure....maybe mention it to your partner if he keeps showing his ugly mug. You could always attack him with a wooden fork 🙂 LB x

That's why the triangle works yiu only need one side broken and all is good. It was explained to me as the Swiss cheese effect buy I'm to drunk to explain so Google it.

KTF

Thanks LB and Martin for your as always support and kind words .

Its lovely when you can come here to rant and people understand so well , I guess its why it works .

I know deep down its because of all thats happening at the mo , just a bit frightening to think how your mind tricks into thinking that it'll be alright to nip off and have a quick punt , nobody will know , youv'e got a few grand and who's gonna know if you take a couple of hundred from it ? but I know perfectly well that a couple of hundred will end with me blowing the lot , I know I wouldn't have really done it, I seriously couldn't after all this time and the thought of letting my daughter down just horrifies me but it shows that had I been back in the early stages it could well of happened . I'm far to strong now and have enough time under my belt that allows me to think everything through , its just that old feeling I had really made me feel a bit vulnerable again for a while .

I did google the swiss cheese effect Martin as you were in no fit state to explain :)) and got it now about the holes in the cheese all lining up ( makes sense ) cheers buddy ! .

I'll leave you all to your evenings now , LB pressing wild flowers that she picked on her country walk today ? and Martin getting quietly pi55ed somewhere or have I got that the wrong way around ? .

Cheers Guys , love to you both xx

Hey Alan...sorry to read my booty that you've had a tuff week...not nice to think one of us is feeling P**P....but twas nice to read that you fought of the old demo because of the strength that's developed within you along your
journey....shows tis all working according to plan. ..result !
As for the jumped up little sprogs coming into your shop and being donkey holes ....I know your witty enough to cut them down !
I've had some terrible passing customers this weekend....caused devastation. ..................

Bloody sheep got out and ate my f*****g flowers from my booty New tubs !
They have since been given a 6 month ban from the premises....under section 34 of the licensing act...
: )
Take care my love...keep smiling...x

Bin online but too much paperwork to get me a firearms certificate coz apparently even a rifle with chip fork bullets is illegal (I know right, bloody Nanny state) these days! Shame, sounded like a lot of fun 😉 Now the curfew would solve those counter slouchers (if we added a PlayStation clause) but I reckon a run of electric fence would be sweet (not allowed a taser to give them a quick "back away, bleeeeeeep!", I checked)!

Try not to sweat the urges Pops...We were the Devil's own loyal customers for many many years so just think of it as the 'after sales'. You know the car garage that calls to remind you your Morris Minor that you got rid of in '66 (wish you hadn't) is due an MOT or the "I hear you have been involved in an accident?" type callers...No matter how many times you tell them to sling their hook (since blowing a whistle down the telephone was outlawed, probs) they keep calling back! We're the lucky ones remember...Some people have a daily battle to stay safe, @ least we get respite from our urges! If they keep niggling, maybe worth getting the Missus to have a look @ the accounts with you so it stops it being 'easy' to siphon off anything!

Zzzzzzz, yawn...So, do you do meal deals then or wot? Our local kebab house does...They cost 20p more than if you order the items separately but hey, we all like nice round numbers 😉 I did ask the staff about it once but he smiled, shrugged, raised his hands & said 'me no Eeenglish' before asking me how I was getting on in my new job...I shouldn't laugh but it's pure genius right 😉

Awesome news about the pooch but seriously no point fishing on my diary for sympathy, my toe's been broken for years, do you hear me complaining? Our 4 legged friend had a little adventure of his own today too (turns out the NM should have listened to me about the gate & dogs chasing cats)...Ended up with him (the mutt) sprinting straight past a red face NM & leaping into his bed, through the equally wide open front door, where he sat quaking with a suitably sheepish grin on his face waiting for Mr Huffy Pants to get back home. I don't like them having surnames either (weird) but our poorly lab had a prescription that we had to get @ the chemist & his 'middle' name was 'the dog' so it made it cute instead of sleazy, that helped 🙂

Keep ranting Pops, if nothing else, it keeps me amused 😉

Thanks for the well wishes the other day, weve been on hard but rewarding jouney together and as we always say it been a pleasure.

Lol, lol, lol...got that f*****g tune stuck in my head now. Thanks for that!! Seriously, haven't you got anything better to do with your time? I'm sure there's young uns you could be shouting at.Which reminds me, can I add to yours and Kelly's list of really annoying things...people who sit in the middle lane on motorways. Learn to drive for ffs. It's for overtaking, not for pootling along at 60 because you can't be arsed to change lanes. "Never had an accident".... but caused thousands. Does my head in. And people driving on their mobile phones. And why sit me next to people with young kids when I'm out for dinner? I don't want to be near them thanks very much. And salmon. For no good reason, other than I'm sick of the stuff. Oh, and that Michael Mosely chap who seems to be taking over the telly with his annoyingly smug face. And of course, Donald Trump. And it's too hot. Ok, I'll stop now. Seem to have gone off on one there!! Thanks for the therapy 🙂 🙂 xx

Thanks for dropping by Al. So true about those nuns!! Teaching us as early as 6 years old that it was our moral duty to take the pi ::ss ha ha.. Where is heaven anyway???

Checking in on my old jaffa cake cooking freind hope a is well
And no local hudlems have been disturbing the peace this week?
Kisses

Hello Deeeeano my old buddy , how you doing ? hope your well ? As always great to hear from you and to be honest if your not going to have permanant home on here , I'd better at some point visit you on your FB group if I'm allowed ? I'll contact you after all the hullabaloo of the weddings over and me holibobs at the end of August , should have a bit more time to breathe by then :))

Well good evening dear diary , ready for a rant ?.

Don't worry alls good and great again in my world , so no nasty stuff tonight :)).

Last week was a real nasty twisted thought kinda week and not one I want to repeat to often , horrible niggly gambling feelings all stress related due to my daughters wedding ( and yes I know I keep bangin on about it ) but all the planning really got to me last week , so instead of keep stressing about not having time to get things sorted , I decided to take Saturday off work and close the shop ( nothing wrong with that you might think ) but as it was "Admirals cup " week "daaan saff where I live " and Joe public and the "Yachty squad " we're out in force I knew friom last year I'd miss a pretty busy day :(( , however I am learning that money isn't everything , my daughters big day is going to come first and my body last week was screaming at me " I'm Feccked " so the day off I had .

I was in so much pain my feet were killing me from all the fourteen hour day's and the broken toe , ( sorry Kelly I kniow you have one too, coz you made sure you told me : ) , that caused my hips and back to start again and I just really wanted to lay down and sleep ,

So slept in till ten , then had the most productive day for a long while , went through my to do list like a man with a huge to do list ( what else ) ? .

Then continued along the same line today., with the result that my mind is pretty clear of clutter and the stressyness of last week has gone and once again calm within my noggin has returned , admittedly I still have a couple of things to do this week but I know everything will be sorted by Monday of next week when we fly out (Yipeeeeeee) !!.

Just been sat for the last two hours tweeking the speech that really didn't need it coz it's " Brilliant " and if I'm happy it's gotta be good :)) As you would imagine a fair bit of humor in there and all sides get their share as I wouldn't want to leave anyone out but also enough of the soppy stuff at the end to get the all the Mum's and Dad's blowing loudly into their hanky's , ( just hope I can pull it off without sobbing myself as I did when proof reading it earlier )..

Looking around the forum earlier and seen a few rumblings of discontent on a couple of threads, part of me felt like diving straight in , just as I would have done a few months ago but I must be learning something on here as I realised it just wasn't my argument , the lord knows I've had enough of those with people on here and myself at times over the rights and wrongs of recovery , in my book as long as it works it's good , Ga's there abstinance is there , therapy's there and this place is here , use them as you see fit and get on with your life .

Spent last night out with my partner living that crazy life ( couple of beers and a curry ) but with her company I'm always happy , she's just beautifull in all ways and I love her so much xx.

My son's been home this weekend ( when I say home ) he worked at the" Americas cup" for three days at the Champagne bar at Southsea Castle , He sent me a Wassap msg earlier and Sir Bens about 5 feet away from him in the background and he's rubbing shoulders with all the" Hoighty Toighty " Yachty's and all he can say is" Look at how hot the women are here " and " How they keep touching his @r*e" when he's serving drinks ( Lucky bleeder ) , at his age I ran a mobile Disco and did a bit a t a local radio station but all I ever got was spotty girls with pigtails and pork pie in their teeth from the buffet of their Granny's 96th birthday asking me to play anything by Johnny Matthis ( coz me gran loove's him ) FFS , life's so unfair at times :((.

Took my recovering old " Puppy dog" for a walk this morning , along with the new kids it's the first she's had in a few weeks so took her to the lake for a swim and she loved it ( free hydrotherapy ) but she's out for the count now , the eldest lad we have has a few learning issues ( nothing major ) but I'd told him to watch out for some pooh that I'd noticed on the ground , he looked back at me and said "What Alan " so I repeated " Watch out for the pooh " just as he walked straight through it ? , all I could do was laugh and so did he ( What can you do eh ) ? .

We're taking them to the Island at the end of August and I've promised to show them some Dinosaur footprints on one of the beaches I know and they are so excited about it :)) can remember doing the same with my kids not so long ago ( well , it seems that way ) .

Ok so all's good in my little world and I hope everyone else is reaping the benefits of being gamble free and just enjoying life " Warts n all " ? .

Will catch up just before we go next week dear diary x.

To all my good buddy's in recovery out there ( especially Deano ) coz I have to keep an eye on him ?? , stay safe and love to all xx

Morning Harold you're are always welcome on the Facebook page and it would mean I could get one up on Oldham because he reckoned I had no chance of getting you to join. I'm sure the group will be ecstatic on your arrival as most of them comment in your diary at some point a few don't use this site anymore but just use the group on Facebook.

Anyway I'm all good still not gambling but some day's still struggling I'll post a new diary up tonight as it will just block your's up with my feelings.

Have a great day my old chum
Deano x

Hi Alan,

Thank you for your kind words today.

Sometimes we want individuals to prove us wrong but sometimes you cant argue with those who refuse to listen.

Best wishes

Cheers Al I will peak with her after her holiday needs putting to bed

The can't kid the kidder takes me back to a school holiday in Spain 3 rules no drinking no smoking and no girls on out room

Broke then all and about 5 of us got catch absolutely p*s sed and was told be a teacher if you remember can't kid the kid who kid the Kidders in the morning we would get of lightly didn't happen but was worth it

I'd be happy if dean got one up on me

KTF

Alan Al Alan!!!

Hi ☺. I like to read your updates and they bring such a strong positivity and clarity! You're doing really well and with 300+ days under your belt life can only get better with each day! Even brats (can i say that? :-0) wondering into your shop while catching pokemons, broken toe (you must just let it heal) and pressure of upcoming joyful celebration in your life cannot take away what you have reaped in your journey so far - peace, pride, happiness, clarity, love, strength, understanding..etc.

Be proud & keep moving on ☺

S x