So for about 3 years now i have been sturggling with online casino gambling, before that it was just the odd flutter in the bookies on football, or quick visit to the casino after a night out.
My first loss was a meer £500 and i was devastated, but i never learnt my lesson. After that I would bet small for a few months and always end slightly up. It was this that drew me in, why end up slightly up when i could end up by a lot, lifechanging mounts, enough to double my wage with little effort etc.
Over the 2 and half years after the initial loss, i suffered 4 big losses of 1.5k, 2.5k, 2k and finally 4.5k. Thats £10,000 lost clicking a button. The last loss has hit me the hardest, not only being the biggest, but leaving me with less than half the amount gambled left to my name, and bills to pay next month.
I would learn my lesson for a month or so after a big loss, then slowly find myself back gambling. a few months down the line ive gone from £1 or £2 bets back to £200 per hand again, inevitably losing all that i had over and over again.
I dont know what to do, i have self excluded from so many sites, only to just google and sign up to another one whenever i have the urge. Even now, just an houre after that heavy loss and thinking my relationship might be over becasue of it, i still have the urge to have one more go to cover the loss.
I cant face telling my parents as they have been so good to me over the years, Paying for more than their fair share. My other half knows of the previous losses and i told her never again. I'll have to tell her about this one but i think it will be one too many. I barely earn £12000 a year so after spending what i need to to live, this will take several years to recover from. I had planned on moving out and proposing, but now that has all gone out the window and i feel like my life has gone backwards about 3 years.
Who would have thought that clicking a button could ruin someones life so much
Steve
I am the parent of someone like you and with a very similar story and I am feeling for you right now. You have done the right thing by coming on here because I have the feeling you have reached that stage of "Rock Bottom" and you are maybe ready to finally sort all of this out. I know it is easier said than done but please think about telling your parents and partner asap. Yes, they will be upset and shocked but there will be relief all round once your secret is out in the open and plans can be put in place. Maybe they can help you control your finances and offer support - that has proved successful in our case. Gamcare counsellers here are excellent for offering advice on self exclusion and sorting out debt problems and emotional support so never be afraid to give them a ring. It is possible to turn this around if you try and stay calm and make a list of what you need to do. The first thing on that list being before you tell your parents get as much information off gamcare as possible so you can discuss that with your family and it shows you are trying to make things better. You may come across some of my posts on here now and again and I have probably repeated the above many, many times - I do wonder if I get on peoples' nerves sometimes as I do tend to go on a bit!!. However, I do this because I really do not want any other young people to suffer with this sad and life-changing problem and there are other parents that come on here who would say the same. If you follow at least some of the advice above and from Gamcare and do not try to face this on your own you will start to feel better about yourself. I hope you start to feel better soon and good luck with your recovery.
Get rid of access...to bankcards..money. go to your bank and get account card only(not possible to gamble online with these). We CANNOT gamble without access.
Go to GA meeting(s). These help. You will hear stories of people with compulsive gambling addiction and you will get great support and clear your mind.
Read peoples posts here and diaries...full of advice and ways we can turn our lives around!
Goodluck..ive been in your situation and its a long road back but it can be done
Thanks both, yes i have definitely hit rock bottom with my finances at an all time low. Its painful to look at right now.
I have just spent the last few minutes closing any accounts that i still had. I have told the other half and obviously she is not happy, but i think she could tell from my body language that this time really is the last! I'll have to start from scratch and build my life back slowly, hopefully the future still has a bright outcome.
I am yet to tell the parents as they are away, but as soon as theyre back i will have the talk. They have never been into gambling or throwing away money so im sure it will be hard for them to accept and understand. I just hope they can do so and are supportive. They have always seen me as pretty cautios and savvy with money so im sure it wil be a great shock to them both. I will have gone from the son who has tried to save every penny here and there where possible, to the son who has gambled thousands and pretty much all he has to satisfy a quick urge and unexplainable buzz.
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