Hi guys,
I've been referred to this website by my bookmaker after I have self excluded myself from the last website on the internet after being registered on 20 odd websites. I'm only 20 years old and I first came across betting when I was 12 years old and my grandfather opened up an account at bwin so that we could place few bucks on the occassional volleyball matches and some tennis. Betting back then hasn't interested me much and I didn't really start until I was about 15. I went to a local bookmaker as my favourite team was playing and I gave it a shot. It was the back between Arsenal - Barcelona which I happened to predict the outcome and win about 50€ for me that was a big win and next day I went again to place that amount on few other matches. Team scored in the 91st minute and I ran up the stairs, told my parents I just won 150€ from betting, my mum wasn't at all impressed and told me that I need to stop right away otherwise I would develop a gambling addiction and lose it all. I saw my dad's face, now that I think about it I knew why he didn't say much, he wanted me to go through it all myself. I'm just surprised I learn this lesson 5 years later and now few weeks after I won that 150€.
2 years ago I moved to London in order to proceed with my studies, this is where the real gambling addiction signs came about. My parents were helping me with the rent but on the side I would make money from what I told my parents was a part-time job in a local supermarket. What I was really doing was posting and recommending bets to other people, running tennis systems and getting paid for doing live betting sessions telling people what to bet on within a certain community. It was going well, it was going very well, people loved me praised me for my tennis bets. While they were making money from what I was recommending them, I was losing money faster than I could count, I'd never follow my bets 100% for whatever reason. Instead I was betting live tennis and losing most of it. The owner of the site offered me a monthly salary of 500£ per month for my contributions - win or lose I still get the donation of 500£.
Fast forward 1 year, I am still part of that community. However this year things have taken a different turn, I no longer have the control over myself. My parents continue the financial support, I also work part time in a pharmacy and the owner of the site continues to pay me monthy. Overall I make about 1,500£... 600£ goes for the rent and rest... well for gambling. I've been gambling away roughly 700£ each month. Sometimes I end up gambling away more than I can afford so then I need to delay the payment of my rent by 2 weeks until I get paid from my job. As it stands, in the past 3 months I've gambled away 2,500£ which for me is a huge sum, bear in mind I'm only 20 years old and I'm still a student...
The worst thing is, I don't feel any remorse, instead I'm seeking another blood pumping rush. I've been researching this on the internet and it seems like I have a real OCD issue. Every time I'd get paid, deposit some money and don't get me wrong but I would win some money too which then I take out right away and as I like to say to myself "You've done well, now you need to treat yourself"... I end up going on ebay auctions and other websites and I end up buying things I don't need. After that, I end up betting more and I lose all the remaining money I've had for food, rent etc.
I really don't know where to begin with what I think is a serious OCD, every week I need some sort of 'sugar rush' to get me pumped up. Right now I'm sitting here, the rent payment date is today, my credit card is maxed out (300£ limit) and my debit card says 0£. I owe my girlfriend 150£. Last night I had 400£, I started depositing 70-100£ every 50 mins as I was placing bets and losing them on live betting tennis until I placed my last bet at 0.05am and woke up to find out it was a loss.
I want to become part of this community and do my best to overcome this addiction however I don't know what can replace the need for adrenaline in my system, or how can I overcome the need for adrenaline. Betting has been ruining my life slowly for the past months, and yet I still need the 500£ each month that I get from being part of the community. Can I possibly make it work...
Please help me, I need to know what other people would do in my position.
Hi Kraski,
Firstly you've come to this site which is the first step and shows you realise you have a problem and want to beat it. I'm new myself and have been in the same situation as you often going with no sleep just constantly betting and lising in play.
I suggest trying to arrange a counseling session for yourself, talk to someone with experience of gambling and how best to help you with controlling the urges and moving through this.
Also many others on this site are or have been in this situation and can help give you advice.
You can beat this, its going to be hard but you have made the first step which is often the hardest. Hang tough brother and you can get through this, we're all here to support each other, we can beat gambling.
Tnsk
Welcome aboard, you're amongst friends here and a group of people who are going through or who have been through this terrible addiction.
Everyone here will be willing you on every step of the way.
@Tnsk and Steve70, thank you guys. It's day 1 and I try to keep myself occupied in order not to gamble. I was really happy to wake up and see two people that have responded, really didn't think I would get any response!
hi i think there are several positive things you can do.
1) put a gambling blocker on your PC / laptop etc. google ' TXNogam ' you can get a free version for now which will last you for 28 days.
2) consider reporting your debit / credit card lost to your bank. that way you cannot use the cards to gamble online, and you don't need to go into detail with the banks as to why. when the new ones arrive, give the sealed envelopes to your gf for safe keeping. ask her to keep them for quite a while. if you need cash, just go to your bank branch with ID.
3) face the fact that you value your gambling 'buzz' over actually winning money. Successful gambling is about extreme self-restraint most of the time, something you obviously don't have; in all honesty you won't acquire that until you are at least 40 years old. you're too young to gamble successfully, & even when you're older it's extremely difficult. look at good poker players, they don't play rubbish hands only good ones; as you're so obviously addicted to gambling you will play the rubbish ones (or sports bets equivalent) just for the buzz, you won't have the patience to wait days or weeks for a better bet to come up. So you will inevitably lose - you're betting against the book with an inbult % advantage everytime. truth is there may only be a few dozen genuine value sports bets in a year. you won't have the patience to wait for those 'opportunities' as - face it - you just want to gamble.
There's a paradox with compulsive gamblers - of which you are obviously one - that they value money as a measure of success & think that's what life is all about, but at the same time are too willing to waste it / throw it away in an effort to realise their false dream of 'success' by gambling it. acquiring money really isn't what life is about - you're young you should be filling your time with lots of new experiences, travelling, treating / doing things with your gf, enjoying nature, getting fit, using your youthful energy to live life to the full instead of burning it up constantly checking odds / results etc. So please try to lose the emphasis on 'making money' for a while (the irony is that you will inevitably lose money doing so) & enjoy your youth while you still can. It would be tragic to 'wake up' twenty years later realise all of the above & become aware that your youth was totally wasted.
I would desert the 'community' & get another part-time job instead. It's only trapping you. While you're involved with it you'll only lose the £500 (or more) every month anyhow.
5 days on and I haven't placed any bets. I got some money in my account and decided to clear my credit card with it. Now the money is gone from my debit account and the betting temptation is decreasing although I felt like I really wanted to deposit all the money I had in my bank account to the bookmaker. The belief of hitting a gold mine is still there at the back of the head, I cannot get rid of it... Not yet at least
Hi kraski
I'm a recovering CG.
You have recognised that you have a problem which is a very good start. Have you given any thought to attending GA meetings, or seeing a counsellor? This addiction is very tough to beat, and you will need all the support you can muster.
I would have to agree with 'davey' re your 'community work'. If you can possibly avoid working there, I think it would be best for you. The temptation will inevitably get you otherwise.
You would also benefit greatly by reading some of the stories available on this forum. The stories will all be different to yours, however they all have one route cause...gambling. You are too young to waste your life on this mugs game. I spent the better part of 10 years sitting in a pub or club, wasting my life. The only thing I has to show for it at the end was massive debt.
re the adrenalin rush... this is quite normal for a gambler. Speaking for myself, toward the end of my gambling days, I can honestly say that I wasn't enjoying myself, I was just passing time. I knew big trouble was coming my way but I didn't really care enough to attempt to do anything about it. Quite often I thought to myself that I didn't deserve to win anything, I loathed myself.
Finally, if you want to stop gambling, you can. However if you have any doubts about this, it is unlikely that you will. You have to apply yourself and follow thru. It will be tough going, but the end result will be worth it.
Best wishes
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