well back again after more relapse's
bookies taking all my money and the casino.
I even know im not going to win when I walk through the door.
made a bit of progress as I have now left my card back at home so when I ran out of money today I went to get my card and realised it was at home.
it made me feel good and put a smile on my face as I knew I could not lose any more money.
this got me thinking and made me feel a bit stronger is kicking this expensive habit.
I will try again from tm as day one.
feeling sick at the money I lost today as I had to work hard to get it, and within an hour it was all gone.
it has been a bad few months with big loses but I am feeling positive from today.
the machines in the bookies never payout,i never see any happy faces in there just sad broke people like myself.
I am always stressed out about money but if I didn't go in I would be much better off.
I have self excluded from all the bookies this is the only one I can go it so its photo time again.
wishing everyone fighting this the best
mjb
Hi Mjb4000, welcome back to the Forum,
I say this with a lot of respect my friend, but you need to be posting before the event, at the point where you are about to make a mistake and not afterwards.
I did the same before stopping for good five years ago so I don't have a lot of ground to talk from, but I now realize how important it is to get some contact before you make a big mistake.
You have to ask yourself what the endgame is my friend. Your first post, three years ago, said that you were 45, you were going to self-exclude and give this your all - time is drifting by my friend; you have to ask yourself whether you will be posting something similar in another three years time and could you handle reaching a stage where it is too late to turn back the clock?
It has to be zero tolerance from now on my friend; you need to do much, much more to start getting to a point where you can go months and years without gambling - you say you left your card at home; that's great if you don't gamble at all but, even if you lose one penny, it is still a huge mistake and you have made no progress at all.
I'm saying what I am because I want you to take this up a notch or twenty - you have been given some amazing advice and now is the time to take everything on board and stop completely, for good forever; promise yourself that you will come on here and speak to someone when you feel tempted - if you come here, each and every time you make a mistake, then people can only repeat what they have said already. If people can help before you start, then it might stop you.
I hope you can my friend, I hope you can make a real and positive start this time around. I don't want you to keep going round, trapped inside this vicious circle for years on end but it will take hard work and committment from you to change this habit ot a lifetime.
JamesP
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