In a dark place.

I'm by no means an expert and there will be plenty more people with more experience and knowledge who will offer better advice.

1. Keep at the counselling.

2. Self exclude from everything and anything you normally gamble. There's software to block websites etc.

3. Come clean to your mum. You'll feel better for it after the dust settles and it may be an option to let her take control of your finances.

4. Wake up every morning and promise yourself that you won't gamble.

I've been in your position mate. It's tough going but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm only 16 days gamble free and it really is one day at a time. I'm a compulsive gambler. By no means cured but it's only 16 days and I'm already thinking a bit clearer and seeing gambling in a different light.

use this forum to talk about how your feeling and how your coping with abstaining. The guys and girls on here have all been or are going through exactly what you are.

Lastly.. Dont ever act on suicidal thoughts no matter how tempting it may be. There's much more important things in life than money and your life is worth much more than any debts. Relationships can be rebuilt, money can be earned but you can't get back from the dead.

Keep your head up.

GU4G

Hi GA1,

You seem to have reached a point now where you definitely need to quit so you've done the right thing by coming here.

Please read the stuff that follows as some of it will be of help to you. You'll need to be determined and have strong measures in place to prevent you from gambling. I've got to 71 days "clean" and it's very much one day at a time but you will gain confidence as the number of days free of gambling mount up. I did and it's a good feeling to have even a little money you can call your own. Other people may post advice for you as well in due course.

Contact gamcare for access to free counsellng and or attend your local GA meetings.
Should you be suffering from severe depression because of your situation then discuss this with your doctor.
Block online gambling sites by downloading K9 and have someone else set the P/word. They must keep it secret from you. If you cannot get someone to set it then make a nonsense one up and copy and paste it. Something like xx11pjjjn"!yn33$$ so it's impossible to remember if you view it.
You can also buy Gam-block or Betfilter to block sites if you wish.
If you cannot block a particular electronic device then sell, give it away or dump it and obtain an "old fashioned" type.
Self exclusion from casinos/High St bookmakers is advisable if you have been using them.
Put your finances in the hands of a trusted family member. This is so that you can only have a limited amount of money available to you to enable you to get through on a daily basis.
You should advise close members of your family about your problem and the fallout from it (debts)etc. Their emotional support could prove essential during your recovery. If you cannot tell your family you can go it alone. I have HAD TO DO THAT but I wouldn't recommend it for most people. I use the this site a lot and The 2015 Challenge is helping me tremendously (great work by Phil on that). Starting a Forum diary helps a lot of people.
If being a CG has really upset the applecart with your family they can contact GAM-ANON for advice. Their is a family and friends section on the FORUM.
If your financial state is disastrous then make sure that you keep a roof over your head. This is your priority. Make sure that payment arrangements are made for necessities (gas, electric, food, transport, childrens stuff etc). Unsecured creditors (cards etc are not a main priority). You may even have to offer them say £1 per month each and get the interest frozen. You do not have to tell them you have a gambling problem if you don't want, only that you are over committed. I WOULD STRONGLY SUGGEST THAT PEOPLE IN FINANCIAL DIFFICULTY SHOULD CONSULT A NON FEE CHARGING DEBT MANAGEMENT COMPANY FOR ADVICE ABOUT CREDITORS AND THE WAY FORWARD FINANCIALLY. I would suggest Stepchange/payplan/national debtline may offer advice.
I've found that keeping myself busy has been instrmental in keeping my mind from the devil's clutches. I find gym work helps me no end. i get myself so knackered that gambling is the last thing on my mind. Walking is great as well so is swimming. You can take up old or start new hobbies. There is a thread on the Forum devoted to keeping busy.
The CG must through up as many barriers in the way of gambling prevention nowadays. It is more vital than ever this is done. The betting companies are forever devising more fiendish advertising campaigns. Temptation is everywhere (TV/Emails/Texts so on and so forth).
We know it's not easy to stop being a CG but it can be achieved. I'm now nearly 70 days "clean" and mentally it feels very good. it's very much one day at a time and thoughts still go through my head about the wins I've had. I counter this in my mind because I'm safe in the knowledge that gambling thoroughly WRECKED my life and I mean WRECKED IT f*****g MONSTER SIZE (younger people heed my words).
For me the initial test of a CG's determination to quit is when they begin to have some spare cash floating about again (couple of gambling free months in, maybe). He or she gets itchy fingers. The initial shock of a big financial loss has blown over and the sickening feeling has subsided. It seems like a mighty fine idea to play the available cash up and they may well "win" initially. In all but extremely rare cases they "win" and the initial "bank" and sometimes much more besides is squandered in a greedy gambling o**y. Then the dark sickening clouds appear again. Thoughts like "How do I pay the rent, feed the kids, pay the leccy, gas bill, explain to the wife/husband and so it goes on. This reinforces the need for stringent anti-gambling measures to be in place to protect the person involved (and those around them) from serious mental/physical/financial damage.
Personally, I've found after nearly70 days free I'm thinking with much more clarity. I feel better due to my increased level of physical exercise. My moods are lighter and there is even a small amount of money in the bank now. That money is mine and not earmarked to increase the bookmaker's profits. Life's still not perfect but it was even less perfect whilst I was in the grips of the gambling demon.

Take Care Now GA1

Givingup4good wrote:

I'm by no means an expert and there will be plenty more people with more experience and knowledge who will offer better advice.

1. Keep at the counselling.

2. Self exclude from everything and anything you normally gamble. There's software to block websites etc.

3. Come clean to your mum. You'll feel better for it after the dust settles and it may be an option to let her take control of your finances.

4. Wake up every morning and promise yourself that you won't gamble.

I've been in your position mate. It's tough going but there is a light at the end of the tunnel. I'm only 16 days gamble free and it really is one day at a time. I'm a compulsive gambler. By no means cured but it's only 16 days and I'm already thinking a bit clearer and seeing gambling in a different light.

use this forum to talk about how your feeling and how your coping with abstaining. The guys and girls on here have all been or are going through exactly what you are.

Lastly.. Dont ever act on suicidal thoughts no matter how tempting it may be. There's much more important things in life than money and your life is worth much more than any debts. Relationships can be rebuilt, money can be earned but you can't get back from the dead.

Keep your head up.

GU4G

Thanks so much for this, I can take all of these steps apart from telling my parents. Not right now anyway as I really don't want to make ther mad/upset/agry/disappointed or let down. I want to tell her about what I have gone through but when the time is right. Like when I'm out of debt that's the best time Maybe so the re is no pressure about being in debt!

Hi GamblingAddict1

I'm a recovering CG.

I really think that you should tell your mum now. Will you ever be debt free from gambling? Ask yourself this question....When I next get my hands on some money will I use it to pay off some debt, to pay my mum some rent, or will I gamble it in the hope of winning it all back?

Do not think that your willpower alone is strong enough to prevent you from gambling. Look back into what has happened in the past. You are going to need help in overcoming this addiction. Support from family is very important, but they can't help you if they don't know of your problem.

Best wishes

wal1957 wrote:

Hi GamblingAddict1

I'm a recovering CG.

I really think that you should tell your mum now. Will you ever be debt free from gambling? Ask yourself this question....When I next get my hands on some money will I use it to pay off some debt, to pay my mum some rent, or will I gamble it in the hope of winning it all back?

Do not think that your willpower alone is strong enough to prevent you from gambling. Look back into what has happened in the past. You are going to need help in overcoming this addiction. Support from family is very important, but they can't help you if they don't know of your problem.

Best wishes

Thanks for for your post mate! I want to tell family but I can't bring myself to do it. It's too hard to come to terms with doing it. But I agree with everything you have said i jt wish I had it in me to do so.

Get yourself a couple of weeks gamble free mate. That'll give you time to think about things and believe me even after just a couple of weeks no gambling your outlook changes on things. Might be in a better place to talk to family then. If not get yourself to a GA meeting there will be people there who have had similar experiences. They might be able to give you tips etc

.........

Thanks for your comments guys, I'm going to self exclude myself. I have told my friend what's going on and he's supportive. I think with just his word can help me to change. Telling my mum may only make matters worse.

Chris