A fresh start

Hi rick

I gave everything and more ending up with 30000 plus in debt it wasn't the debt in the end it was total hopelessness but I knew I had no more to give it I had no feelings and I was glad it had Beaten me because it could not have any more don't get me wrong it still try's and it's hard but we have to let go in the end and face up to our responsibilities and reality which is what gambling leaves us with debt lies and self loathing and much more you know in your heart you will never win that money back let it go and start again

We have to be honest with ourselves we have to start paying that gambling debt off and we do that by abstaining it's bloody hard but it is the only wY to go in the end

Once you do realise that it's game over you will feel a release

You say you can't do a debt plan I have done one myself and already my credit rating has shot up ( it's a joke really)

Only you can choose what you want to do but me I would rather have a sane life paying my debt off than keep trying to win my debt back because we know the outcome of that even more debt

It's not easy none of it but try to do a self management plan without jeapodising your job because you do have to address your debt and be totally honest with yourself otherwise you will carry on in this misery of gambling and that is not your answer

Best wishes Suzanne x

Hi Suzanne. I've started to contact my creditors. Hoping they let me set up an arrangement, give me a bit of time to catch up. I think the reason I'm feeling so low is because I can't even pay my bills, car finance and rent. I don't know what I'm going to do.

I know that the situation is as bad as it can get right now. Not much I can do about it. But if I quit gambling, I can make sure I'm not back here again. I need to get my life back.

Tomorrow is day one all over again. I need to succeed this time.

Hi rick

I really feel for you I do know where you are coming from

I had to forgo my essential bills for a month and I rang my non essential debters on a daily basis it's simply a ridiculous situation to end up in all because we gambled our money away

Well done for contacting your debtors I did it one day at a time but it did get sorted

Rent and essential bills I got in touch with and I believe as long as you tell them you can't pay for a month or too I am sure they will be supportive as long as you let them know you can't pay them

You will get out of this mess that you think at the moment is hopeless

Again I. Really feel for you but.it will. Get better

And you can succeed this time

I am living on pennies but making sure I have enough to live on after paying my debts and bills

You can do this tomorrow is another day and day 1 and then day 2

Suzanne x

It really is a ridiculous situation to be in. Why do we do this to ourselves. It' seems crazy when you're thinking rationally. But when I'm gambling I lose my grip on reality until the money has gone. Then it hits me like a tonne of bricks.

I've just been trying so hard to pay everything on time and just ended up in a payday loan cycle that I can't get out of.

I'm trying to set up plans for the payday loans. Hopefully they will give me a few months to pay instead of having to use all my wage on them every month. That will be a start at least. And I've cancelled all my direct debits for the credit cards. Need to prioritise and make sure I pay the important bills. What a mess hey. I've had one of the worst days of my life today. Been in an extremely dark place. But tomorrow is another day. I need to get through this. If I can go gamble free for the next 4 months and spend very little money on myself... Then I might be able to get things back on the right track. Going to take years and years to fix the damage though. But I guess a lot of us here are in the same boat.

Thank you for your supportive posts today. Really appreciate it.

R1ck

Fella sorry to read you seem to be stuck between a rock and a hard place.

I spent many months there towards the end of my gambling life,f**k the postman became my nemesis and all sense of reality became so warped that I could not see anything for what it was.

I stole money,I gained money under false pretense,I stole food to feed my family,all to punt.

No win ever big enough,because whilst at it the money is irrelevant it is only once it's gone then the shame would kick in.

You are at a cross roads fella

For me the key comes through HONESTY

you are living a lie,it will only get worse,it will all come crashing down without honesty in my experience.

Fella take some help,not help to fund the next punt,that won't help at all.

Take the help out there.

The other option will bottom line do far worse than devastate your credit score!!!

Give recovery a real try,what have you got to lose?? it costs nothing except a choice taken through honesty.

Regards Duncs

Hi Duncs.

I'm going to give it a real try mate.

I can't fix this mess I'm in. But I just need to remember how bad I feel at this moment, whenever I'm tempted to gamble. Because if I stop, I can avoid the happening in the future. That needs to be my motivation.

This is about the 4th time I've really hit rock bottom and each time, I felt sure I would stop this time because the pain it was causing me was unbearable.but each time, once the pain wore off, I would return to gambling.

Today is day 1. Again. Hopefully this is the day where I turn my life around. It has to be. I have no choice anymore. I'm sick of letting people down. People who trust me. Who I've lied to. I'm disgusted in myself for how I've behaved. Particularly th last 18 months. That's when my gambling reached new levels. I went from betting 50 quid stakes, which was bad enough, to betting 600,.800. Sometimes more. I can't believe someone like me, who used to be so frugal and sensible when it comes to money, could have turned into this person. I'm such an idiot.

Day 2 coming to an end. Don't have any money to gamble even if I wanted to so not sure it counts. But still. It's a start.

Hi rick

Well done on day 2 ofcourse it counts because everyday you are gamble free it builds up your positiveness to keep abstaining and makes you stronger

Every day makes you stronger so when you have money again you will have had time to think and step back from this destructive addiction.

Hey do you really want another month like this one I am sure you don't

I hope you have got your debts sorted it's awful I know to get in touch with them all Infact it's s**t but you should only have to do it the once if plan is arranged

Take one day at a time with all of it and keep focused positive and strong

Suzanne xx

Hi Suzanne. The answer is no. I never want to be in this situation again and that is the reason that I will not gamble. Unfortunately, I'm facing the prospect of an extremely tough year because of the mess I've made. But I know if I gamble, I will end up ruining next year too. The sooner I stop, the sooner I get my life back. Feeling positive that I can go this at the moment, I have never felt lower than I did on Saturday and the pain is still raw enough to stop me from bring tempted to gamble. hopefully it will prove to be the turning point in my life. If I can remember how I felt that day, every time I'm tempted, then hopefully that will help me to stay strong.

Hi rick

I wish you all the best and feeling positive is a very good defence

Suzanne x

Hi Rick,

What I have come to understand of this illness is the first week is the worst...Once you get over that it does get easier. Just make sure you have tools in place for when the demon strikes without warning. I have been through enough highs and lows to experience this.

As many posters have said time, money location....scratching head (sounds right!)

As i'm typing a record has come on the radio that I would like to dedicate to you, I believe in karma and music.

Bridge over troubled water...simon and garfunkal(can't spell it grrrr)

Please take the time to listen to the words...They are reaching out to you.

Womble xx

R1ck

fella the solution to all you problems won't be fixed through you arresting the punt fella but you can 100% guarantee yourself you will not add to lives woes with the decision to arrest the punt.

Through arresting your destructive gambling you will gift yourself the chance to right the wrongs yes but also you will gift yourself to find out what life is like without everything being given to chance.

Tell me if I am wrong but your 'buzz' from gambling doesn't come from winning any more it comes from escaping,from getting from one bad situation to the next.

I see it,f**k I lived it,winning became a warped sense of getting out the financial hole.

Today you did not gamble,you did not add to your self made stack of sh#it,whether you had money or not is to me irrelivant,today you did not gift yourself a mindfook. for that be happy.

You won't fix the finances today or tomorrow,how long has it taken to build the debt??

I figure through hard graft it will take twice as long to pay it back.

Suck it up fella,nobody forced you to gamble,the debt is yours.

The debt is but a side effect of the compulsion to gamble,the same as the money is just the fuel to gamble with.

You joined a very elite club today,a club where compulsive gamblers become winners.

It is not all doom and gloom,from the shi#t roses grow.

Keep making the right choice

Abstain and maintain

Duncs stepping forward never back

Womble/Duncs, thanks for taking time to post on my page. I really appreciate the support.

Duncs, you talk a lotof sense my friend. It will indeed take a long time to pay back the debt. But I just have to live with it. As you say, nobody forced me to gamble all my money away.

I've taken steps to contact the companies I owe money to and most have been quite helpful. I have no money in my pocket and no money coming for 17 days but somehow I'm still feeling more positive!

3 days gamble free. Don't miss it. No urge to do it. Never want to gamble again.

Just checking on you Rick, Hope you are coping ok? Remember the first part is the hardest...each day from then gets better. Rooting for you and your family.

Sue x

Hi Sue. Thank you for your concern. I'm pretty down in the dumps. I've really screwed things up now. Looks like I'm going to have to move out of my home and possibly sell my car because The debts are unmanageable. Each day is a battle at the moment But I will get there.

On the positive side, I got through day 4 gamble free without even giving it a thought. I think it's***t home that I have to stop Otherwise I will never be able to get my life back on track.