Better to Ramble than Gamble.

Good days, bad days and all those inbetween. What matters is your here and still trying. Get your mocca groove on.

Evening ktf

I just want to thank you for your diary. I came on this forum on Thursday and after reading your diary it's helped me so much. I think I'm on post 400 but I have to admit I jumped to the end the other day just for a quick look to make sure you were still gamble free as I really felt for you and didn't want all your pain and hard work to be for nothing.

Not had a bet today or since my last post.

Right I've given my head a wobble and snapped out of my self pitying slump.

Tough morning seeing all people on FB enjoying Father's Day had a text of my lad this morning and I think he is coming round in a bit.

Looking forward to the open meeting on Tuesday be good to meet up with wishicouldstop if anyone else is around the oldham area you are more than welcome to drop in.

KTF

Hey ktf....Monday morning again...Facebook can be a bit "isn't my life perfect"...I often look at some people's posts and think...blimey...what a great life they got...etc etc. ..but as we all know....life's not always as it seems ...anyway...lovely that you got that text....least you know he was thinking about you...little bricks build big houses....so stay strong...stay happy...xxx

Morning Martin , I feel a bit awkward posting what a great day I had yesterday and then seeing you were a bit down on Sunday , I hope you managed to spend a bit of time with your boy and had a good day in the end , take care buddy and speak to you soon . AL .

Lol , he's starting young buddy , maybe time to start taking a leaf out of his book and go find yourself a bit of action , I can feel the new pack of Primarnis coming out soon :)) . Cheers Martin

Hi Martin, not sure what 'no spoilers' meant on dizzy's thread, but if my comment upset you, I am sorry.

Hi KTF. Looking forward to the meeting tonight. See you there

Not gad a bet today or since my last meeting.

Looking forward to GA tonight, open meeting I know quite a bit about one guys start but not as much about the other guy so will be good to hear what brought him to GA in more detail and how he has got 4 years of recovery.

It will also be good to meet wishicouldstop my first face to face meeting of one of my fellow Gamcare members. Not sure what he will look like so I might wear a flower in my lapel and stand under the clock so he can spot me.

KTF

Hope it goes well Martin...I always enjoy our open meetings and I find it also helps the families and Gamanon members to hear some therapies.

My name is Tony so hope that helps u recognise me ha

I really enjoyed the open meeting tonight some great therapys one stood out I was expecting something completely different I thought we would get a tale of woe but he based it on serinity prey, broke it down into how his life is changing for the good.

It was good to meet wishicouldstop didn't get to spend to much time with him but hopefully I will when circumstances allow in future.

Ended up having a few pints after with one of the guys which I really enjoyed.

I was also reminded of a poem tonight I've seen it a few times on here but it's worth another share.

I am an addiction
i start in small subtle ways promising many things
I promise you enjoyment and pleasure beyond your wildest dreams
I deliver guilt and despair more horrible than your worst nightmare
I promise you power and courage
I give you feelings of powerlessness and hopelessness
I will force you to live in fear always
I promise you relief and escape from all your daily problems
I create for you greater problems than you ever imagined
I promise you many friends
I only allow isolation
I promise happiness
I create much sorrow
I will steal from you your dignity, your familes, your friends, your children, your homes, your dreams, your spirit and your life
For love freedom and happiness are impossible to find in my presence
So never underestimate me
I am devious and manipulating
I have no preference as to who i pick as my victim, rich or poor, young or old, black, white, yellow or red
I have killed men, women and children- I have no conscience
So if you have met me, always beware if you think you can beat me, that i will be gone from your life and all will go well again
Never forget i will always be there, waiting in the dark shadows just around the corner
I am very patient and i will laugh in your face if i can lure you into my evil world of hell on earth once again
I AM ADDICTION

JFT KTF

Thanks for sharing KTF
Very powerfull poem...sums it up to perfection
Have a good day love x

Oldhamktf wrote:

I really enjoyed the open meeting tonight some great therapys one stood out I was expecting something completely different I thought we would get a tale of woe but he based it on serinity prey, broke it down into how his life is changing for the good.

It was good to meet wishicouldstop didn't get to spend to much time with him but hopefully I will when circumstances allow in future.

Ended up having a few pints after with one of the guys which I really enjoyed.

I was also reminded of a poem tonight I've seen it a few times on here but it's worth another share.

I am an addiction
i start in small subtle ways promising many things
I promise you enjoyment and pleasure beyond your wildest dreams
I deliver guilt and despair more horrible than your worst nightmare
I promise you power and courage
I give you feelings of powerlessness and hopelessness
I will force you to live in fear always
I promise you relief and escape from all your daily problems
I create for you greater problems than you ever imagined
I promise you many friends
I only allow isolation
I promise happiness
I create much sorrow
I will steal from you your dignity, your familes, your friends, your children, your homes, your dreams, your spirit and your life
For love freedom and happiness are impossible to find in my presence
So never underestimate me
I am devious and manipulating
I have no preference as to who i pick as my victim, rich or poor, young or old, black, white, yellow or red
I have killed men, women and children- I have no conscience
So if you have met me, always beware if you think you can beat me, that i will be gone from your life and all will go well again
Never forget i will always be there, waiting in the dark shadows just around the corner
I am very patient and i will laugh in your face if i can lure you into my evil world of hell on earth once again
I AM ADDICTION

JFT KTF

one of my favourites. thanks for the timely reminder Martin. Tri

Hi Martin

Thank you, your last couple of posts to me and especially the last one prompted me out of my hole and got me talking again. Sometimes a simple are you OK is better than anything else.

I think the pub quiz and admitting that was a bet/changing my date was the start of me understanding this wasn't about the money. Saying and understanding are not always mutual friends.

I think I started gambling at such a relatively young age that I never really found out who I am or what I wanted from life. Now I am abstaining I dont have any real reference point to how I should be living my life. Thats in some ways scary but also exciting. Its up to me to find out.

I have a 40th Bday this weekend so I should pay the barbers a visit and get myself freshed up.

Take care

Rob