Focus on the future, because in the future you haven't gambled

43 days free of gambling

150 days to go (5 until 2 week holiday)

344 pounds saved.

796 paid off

0 spent on gambling

Thanks Suzanne and sean for your words of encouragement. Footy got cancelled from lack of players which is annoying but went for a run to keep fitness up. So off last minute holiday shopping today, hopefully not spend too much but I deserve to treat myself every now and again.

Life - 6 (should be a 10 next Sunday as I will be in America for 2 week holiday)

Friends/family - 6 (still turning down the odd things here and there)

Gambling - 6 (A few thoughts while I was bored yesterday, quickly moved on to candy crush)

Financial worry - 5 (Possible job upgrade in future)

44 days free of gambling

149 days to go (4 until 2 week holiday)

352 pounds saved.

796 paid off

0 spent on gambling

So back to work but boss not in so pretty chilled out, did a bit of maths on my debts and hoping we get a good bonus in Oct I should be looking pretty good in my recovery, if I can make it to then with no slips I'm on the way out of this pretty deep hole I'm in. Something to strive to anyway, may even have spare money to treat myself with the bonus which everyone else in the company is looking at doing. Hell I may also be acting like a normal person then 😀

45 days free of gambling

148 days to go (3 until 2 week holiday)

360 pounds saved.

796 paid off

0 spent on gambling

Yet another dull day in the office, also struggled with having to spend 15 quid for my travel insurance, that was the cheapest one as well. I know I probably won't need it and it's 15 quid down the drain but I thought about if I hadn't got it then there was a problem and I wouldn't be able to cover it so worth doing. Should still be ok for money until next payday so long as there are no unexpected costs.

Hi rst

Counting pennies every day is s**t but it getting our debts down and we know it won't be forever as long as we carry on abstaining and maintaining and that is sooo positive for us

Stay strong

Suzanne xx

rst

Fella thanks for the kind words upon my thread,it has been a place of great therapy for me,my ramblings each day gift my resolve and the results of continued abstinence never cease to continue coming.

I gifted more than the hours of my job to gambling each week when I gambled,today the cost of making the right choice in terms of time a fraction of that.

Life will improve my friend

That I can guarantee that.

Enjoy your holiday.

Abstain and maintain.

Duncs stepping forward never back.

P.s Funny how thrifty recovery makes us,that 15 nicker would have gone in the blink of an eye whilst at it fella!!!

46 days free of gambling

147 days to go (2 until 2 week holiday)

368 pounds saved.

796 paid off

0 spent on gambling

So close to holiday and so close to nearly ruining my clean streak, was just sat in bed staring at a gambling website thinking I'll just put 25 quid in, it's not a lot and I could get 10/15 quid back. Luckily tiredness got the better of me and I fell asleep on my thoughts. Thanks dunc and Suzanne will have a great holiday and when I return will be in a very good place on my recovery.

47 days free of gambling

146 days to go (1 until 2 week holiday)

376 pounds saved.

796 paid off

0 spent on gambling

So I'm packed and ready to go stateside tomorrow night. I've made it. When I come back I will have a next target to aim for. On my return my stats will be:

63 days free of gambling

131 days to go (new short term target)

504 pounds saved.

1169 paid off (100+273)

0 spent on gambling

See you in a few weeks.

Hi rst

Well done and have a great holiday gambling free ofcourse

Suzanne x

Well I should be writing the following now after a two week holiday

63 days free of gambling

130 days to go (new short term target)

504 pounds saved.

1169 paid off (100+273)

0 spent on gambling

Instead due to my stupidity the day before I flew I now write:

0 days free of gambling

130 days to go (new short term target tbc)

504 pounds saved.

1169 paid off (100+273)

1200 spent on gambling (rough estimate)

Money +- in last 63 days = +473

So at least I haven't got a new loan out and only spent what I have saved/paid off but it's the questions about why I did it...why did I think 100 would be ok? I'm going to continue my running total at the bottom as it's the only positive I can look at currently. It wasn't just a one off mad go on the day before I flew it was most nights when I had some free time, I was at one point only 600 down and vowed to stop, withdrew what I had left and had a really good few days relaxing but then it was that free time and the fact I had Internet in a room on my own.

So annoyed. Holiday sort of ruined by it too despite trying to be really happy and relaxed around my family.

1 days free of gambling

129 days to go (new short term target - pay off all credit cards by end of Oct (1,100) then get bonus from work to start fresh)

8 pounds saved.

0 paid off

0 spent on gambling (rough estimate)

Money +- in last 64 days = +481

So have realised my trigger is not being on here, I very nearly thought I'm going to carry on this diary saying I've abstained to keep that total going up but knew deep down it would have hurt my recovery.

It's as if I knew I could gamble as no one would know until I get back and by then I could have cleared my issues. How wrong was I. Anyway, will be reading and commenting when I can on people's diaries to help myself and everyone else here.

Rst

Very well done

I salute for being 100% honest

You did not do a big dent

I know we all do this journey in different ways and I know I hVe to post on here every day in my diary for me to keep me going And stay honest

Well done for that and I have a lot of respect for you

Wanted to post earlier but was not sure what to say because I did not want to make you feel worse

Day 2 tomorrow

129 days to go

8 pounds saved

0 paid offl

0 on gambling

MONEY in last 64 days a big plus 481

Rst carrying on head held high because you have not let it beat you

Look forward to your update tomoz

Take care

Suzanne xx

2 days free of gambling

128 days to go (1,000 to pay off before Nov.) -100

16 pounds saved.

0 paid off (long term debts)

0 spent on gambling

Money +- in last 65 days = +589

Thanks Suzanne for your words of encouragement, getting paid today but would have been in such an amazing place if I hadn't blown over 1k. My pay will be going straight to pay of credit card bills I've racked up, two more pay days until Nov should have that 1000 cleared then my bonus will actually feel like a real bonus that I've worked hard for over the year.

Rst

I am pleased to read that you are back on track

And definitely on form

Well done

Suzanne x

3 days free of gambling

127 days to go (800 to pay off before Nov.) -200

24 pounds saved.

0 paid off (long term debts)

0 spent on gambling

Money +- in last 65 days = +797

So payday today and first thing was get rid of my spare cash I usually have left at the end of the month now to stop the temptations. Leaves me with budget amounts for the next 4 weeks but enough to safely live on.

4 days free of gambling

126 days to go (800 to pay off before Nov.) -200

32 pounds saved.

0 paid off (long term debts)

0 spent on gambling

Money +- in last 66 days = +805

Ok so I've just had a look and my target to clear credit card debt by Nov may be a bit too challenging as I have only 200 spare cash to put away each month until i get a pay rise, so will make me struggle, but at least it will be closer to being cleared. Pay rise should come in Jan fingers crossed.

Steady 6 mile run tonight after good day at work, now just chilling in the bath watching TV and coming on here to make sure I don't lapse.