Oh f. You do make me laugh with your expressions. Note. Most gamblers I know are sensitive souls. Sometimes you need to peel away but there you are. Underneath I think we take so much to heart.
Fair weather friends I call them. Anyway a total big hug for yor clean time. You have had to struggle against other odds. I know that as I am in the same club. Standing for Chairman next year lol.
I am pleased to call you my friend.
47 weeks tomorrow great achievement freda and glad to hear your feeling better.
Dont worry about that bluffer hes only a bluffer haha
Hi Freda,
It was nice to speak 2 u in chat, as it always is 🙂
I'm sorry to hear that u have been feeling down, I hope u feel better soon.
U r doing gr8 🙂
Stay strong xx
Thanks ronnie and Charlotte,
47 weeks ago today, was my last gambling episode of any kind. I have been feeling really peed off and irritable lately. I think I am just tired of making an effort to be so nice to people, when a lot of the time it is a waste of energy.
Feeling really low today, and was up at 2am unable to sleep. Just a bad day. Getting a massage on Thursday which I am looking forward to. One of my favourite treats : )
Hiya f....
You made me laugh.....my sis in law so thick skinned that a "Cee U Next Tuesday" comment would roll off her back....I did give it a good go though...
She always has a knack of undermining me and has had a few pops of late that I let slide.Just low today a bit too for similar reasons...giving out and wondering what for.
Anyways ...holiday soon and i shall be carb- ing it up in a whole other place.
Enjoy that massage my lovely
Take care hun
Rach and Doo xxx
Hiya Freda,
Just popping in to give you a hug ((()))...
..hey! ...What I've found is, if being nice requires a lot of effort with a particular person..then it's not for me....if it flows and is easy there is something good happening.
Another hug!
Love Delx
That is a good point Del! : )
Just tired really of insincere people.
Was at the mental health support place yesterday. Felt really low and started crying and couldn't stop. Wasn't for attention, just couldn't hold it in. No one said anything to me for at least half an hour. I am always really cheerful and friendly there, giving other people support, the second I am not a barrel of laughs everyone disappears. I can't be arsed to bother with anyone else there now, whats the point?
So many people don't want to know me, when there is nothing in it for them. People are really full of sheet.
Bit of a depressing post there, but there you go.
Hi Freda,
Sounds like you had a bad time yesterday so I thought I would pop by and lift your spirits with a huge thank you for posting your wise words on my diary. At this stage I think I needed a boost in self belief and you have given it to me.
You are right about people being insincere I have come to the conclusion that most people only think about no.1 There are few truly altruistic souls out there.
But you know what, when you find them they make life that much more special. We can't carry the weight of others insincerities as the load would be too much. But we can embrace the good ones, the golden ones the ones who try to understand us.
Take care and see you along the road we travel for a resounding high five now and again.
Paulds
Hi Freda... how are you?
I think Paulds is right in that there are fewer and fewer trully altruistic people in society. People do use each other to get what they want and when they get what they want then they don't want to know. Not everybody is like that though. Stick with the people that bring you good karma.
Its also the case that some people are simply not able to cope with others distress. Some people are not empathic in any way... but you are. Continue to treat others how you would want to be treated yourself... thats my philosophy anyway. I find it hard to put this into practice sometimes especially with my boss.. but everyhting i do is well meaning. I guess this is the buddist philosophy that you have outlined to me at times.
By the way.. a huge well done on your gambling free time. A fantastic acheivment. take care Freda and enjoy the long bank holiday weekend. I fully intend to... cheers.. S.A 🙂
Thanks SA and Paul,
You are right SA, I am not going to become a sheep and stop bothering with people, just because it isn't returned. I have been feeling very weary lately, of searching through the c**P to find a rare gem.
I won't give up looking, but just going to stop overtrying to be nice as it is draining when few are giving back to you. I will continue to treat even the utter c*nts I encounter with respect, just can't be bothered to make more effort than basic civilness if you know what I mean.
Everyone loses their patience once in a while I guess, and chucks their toys out their pram screaming "why do I effing bother!" It has been a healthy thing for me to do this recently.
The great thing, is none of the toys I chucked out this time was my recovery! : )
I am still struggling with low mood a bit at the moment, but it has given me the chance to see what an awesome hubby I have. He has been really looking after me, and doing whatever he can to help.
I have been pushing forward with my exercise again, and feeling fitter and healthier for it. I have even started to notice a little bit of definition coming in around my abs.
We went to see our gorgeous little nephew yesterday, he is only 4 weeks old. He is gorgeous! made me so broody! baby cuddles always cheer me up : )
Time to drag this a ss into the shower then get out and about for an hour or so.
48 weeks tomorrow!
Hi Freda, thank u 4 ur support on my diary. It means alot 🙂
48 wks 2moro, u r doing brilliant 🙂 U should be soooo proud of urself!
I hope u feel better soon, it's good 2 read that u enjoyed some time with ur little nephew. Bless 🙂
Stay strong and keep going 🙂
Hiya Freda...
Just popping in to say thank you for your understanding and I know by your posts that you are equally as sensitive as I am when it comes to stuff from other people...
Always say that I have not been born with that "second skin"..thats why I get hurt and absorb others cr**.(eeewwww a poo sponge!! )
One thing my mum used to say and I think i said once on here is that if you give with an open heart you get it back threefold ...however...you might not get back from who you want it to come back from if that makes sense.
I think there is a lot of truth in that but I still get so mad and hurt when folk are insensitive.
don't know if you have seen/read these books but i found them really good at explaining that vampire energy when people take from you...or steal your light leaving you drained.
"Toxic People"...by Lilian Glass...gives strategies on how to protect yourself from an assortment of "takers"" and headworkers and narcissists from face to face,to phone calls and internet.
"Hands of Light"'...Barbara Brennan....who is an energetic healer who shows visually how people poach your energy and how to physically stop it...just in the ways we hold our bodies etc...
I do use some of her techniques in work such as blocking/covering stomach area/standing off centre and wearing my glasses as a barrier instead of contacts.
You may have seen them and they are worth a read...
Am all jubilee'd up now and off to sleep....Am really chuffed you have a supportive hubby..you deserve one Freda and he also has one top lady.xxx
Rach and Doo xxx
((((((((((f))))))))))
Hiya Freda...
Just popping in to say thank you for your understanding and I know by your posts that you are equally as sensitive as I am when it comes to stuff from other people...
Always say that I have not been born with that "second skin"..thats why I get hurt and absorb others cr**.(eeewwww a poo sponge!! )
One thing my mum used to say and I think i said once on here is that if you give with an open heart you get it back threefold ...however...you might not get back from who you want it to come back from if that makes sense.
I think there is a lot of truth in that but I still get so mad and hurt when folk are insensitive.
don't know if you have seen/read these books but i found them really good at explaining that vampire energy when people take from you...or steal your light leaving you drained.
"Toxic People"...by Lilian Glass...gives strategies on how to protect yourself from an assortment of "takers"" and headworkers and narcissists from face to face,to phone calls and internet.
"Hands of Light"'...Barbara Brennan....who is an energetic healer who shows visually how people poach your energy and how to physically stop it...just in the ways we hold our bodies etc...
I do use some of her techniques in work such as blocking/covering stomach area/standing off centre and wearing my glasses as a barrier instead of contacts.
You may have seen them and they are worth a read...
Am all jubilee'd up now and off to sleep....Am rally chuffed you have a supportive hubby..you deserve one Freda and he also has one top lady.xxx
Rach and Doo xxx
((((((((((f))))))))))
Hi Dotty,
I am a believer in reincarnation, and I have always instinctively held my stomach when around people I am wary of. As a funny aside, during my brief stint working for the ridiculous department store last summer, I held my stomach so much that someone commented on it and asked if I was pregnant! perhaps I should have realised then, that my instincts were "danger all around! GET OUT!!!!" lol. I think perhaps I have been here as quite a spiritual soul before.
I am learning to give myself a break with the anger, and look at my 'usual' self, as everyone has bad days. My hubby is still laughing about Saturday, when we were walking up our road to go and get lunch. This guy drove really fast up our gravelled, potholed road, and splashed all up my side with muddy water. To be fair to him, he rolled his window down on the way back (as he has been driving up the end to turn his car around) and apologised. I am usually really polite and gracious, but I looked at the floor in a huffy way and said really moodily "it's al - right"
Anyway. Time to focus on the positives in life!:
1. wonderful husband
2. good physical health
3. we are chipping away with our mortgage, and are actually overpaying slightly
4. coming up to 1 year abstinence from gambling (48 weeks today)
5. just over 7 years as a non-smoker
6. supportive employer
7. great in-laws
8. no debt (apart from student loans, and obviously the mortgage)
9. access to free counselling which should be starting anytime now
10. a peaceful home (huge bonus for me, sound pollution is one of the most stressful things for me when it is at home and you can't rest and relax)
I want to do another workout today, as I think it is really helping boost my mood. Onward!
We are available 24 hours a day, every day of the year. You can also contact us for free on 0808 80 20 133. If you would like to find out more about the service before you start, including information on confidentiality, please click below. Call recordings and chat transcripts are saved for 28 days for quality assurance.
