After years of compulsive gambling and losing fortunes. I am now convinced it’s killing me inside and making me ill. I just can’t have it in my life anymore from mood changes to losing and depression setting in to the highs when chasing and getting your money back and losing it all again. Writing on here makes me sound like an absolutely idiot but in reality when your in the bookies in the zone it’s all or nothing. Betting has changed. Too many horses to pick from, bad form. the other Saturday 750 horses running in Britain alone. Then there is football, win, draw and away, now 200 markets in one game. To much to think about and look at for one game. On day 1 again, all blocks are in place. I know I need to stay gamble free this time the angry is getting worse when you think my bets up and it goes down its destruct mode.
Hi
Welcome to the forum.
It is and you must now focus on the reality of gambling. You dont need it in your life. The big questions in recovery is why is it in your life?? There are better feelings to be experienced and better things to do.
They are not offering you anything but the drug of the chase or the drug of blind expectation. If they were offering anything worthwhile they would be out of business within a month.
As you say you are also blinded by choice as if the whole shabang is somehow in your favour...it isn't!! Most if not all problem gamblers are addicted to the drug of playing. Just like the trance of machines it often ends with punters picking saudi arabian horses or teams on christmas day
You need the born again moment. Its not so much a fight as a sudden realisation its the only way to go. You will need help and there is no shame in admitting you were addicted. They wanted you addicted and fast.
Talk it through...look again at what it has done to your finances and add it all up properly. Its scary but there is hope for everyone and you will look back and wonder if it was actually you doing that.
Best wishes from everyone on the forum
You can stop this but must be 100% determined and then commit to it.
finding new interests really helps, plan the days, plan stuff when sports events are on so you are not tempted.
you have to reinvent your life in truth.
good luck, don’t ever gamble, zip, nothing.
Excellent reply joydivider, as always. I agree that it is a crazy scinario whereby gambling takes over your life and you feel helpless to change the behaviour. But looking back as well as looking forward is the key. Our financial situation has been battered and bruised, leaving us with a trail of devistation. Thousands of pounds of debt, worry, stress, dishonesty and despair. Therefore, when we really weigh things up gambling was never a good thing. But change can happen, especially when you have a network of support, understanding and encouragement.
You're not an idiot and you're certainly not alone. You're just one of thousands maybe millions in this world of 7 billion that regularly blows their money on gambling. It's insanity! I don't understand why we don't learn and keep hurting ourselves again and again? It sounds like you're trying to help yourself with the blocks in place. The gambling industry is designed so regular punters end up losing. The odds are so stacked against us and I'm certain that if I'd ever won a large amount of money, it wouldn't have lasted me long. It's the biggest scam really giving you the illusion that you can win. Whenever I've won it's only made me worse. God help us all lol.
Stu
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