i want a successful diary and life i will aim high

Evening Adam good to see a post. Let's try and make this the last day one. Stay focused it might be worth speaking to your landlord and just saying if you see me on the machine pull me off it. It might just make you think about not going on in the first place, let's face it you don't want to be pulled up on public, it could be that extra block you're looking for. Also good to see you sign up the the new year challenge.

KTF

On my lunch day 2 very sunny

​

So day two successfully completed, no poker and no gambling. What do I want at the mo ? I don't know but I spent a lot at the weekend so staying in for a while is a good idea to get back some money. Working full time is good for me keeps me out of trouble. I don't know what I'm going to do with my time sports ? Maybe, tennis this summer ? Maybe, pubs ? No thank you, alcohol ? No thank you, snooker ? Maybe, betting ? No thank you

​

​what do I want to do every evening ? Relax.......that sounds good to me

Knackered

​

Adam have got a virus on your computer or a problem with your keyboard? It's just I keep seeing you post random letters on people's diaries and I'm a little confused.

This will be my last poston my diary.... Ive come to realise I'm spending a lot of time thinking about what I'm spending, adding up all my outgoings each day, week, month and beating myself up about it when I do bad, moneys tight but I shouldn't beat myself up. I find myself thinking about how long ive worked to pay for everyday items. I don't think for me gamcare has been a successful journey and altho ive met a lot of great people who have supported me I don't think I'm going to improve and get down about my actions week in week out.

​

Adam,

GamCare's services provide help and advice but only you can choose to follow it.

If you want to keep gambling, that's your choice and you alone are responsible for what you do. Your gambling is not down to an inadequacy on the part of GC or anyone or anything else.

CW

Hello anon ad,

It sounds like you're feeling demoralised. You're feeling less hopeful about your prospects for improving, and you've come to the view that using the forum has focused your attention on where you're not succeeding. Please try to keep things in perspective anon ad, and remember that everything is relative... rather than compare yourself negatively with others, remember as well where your behaviour has been less harmful and more successful.

It is true that the forum may not adequately meet everyone's needs, as we are all different with varying needs, and for example, some people feel they flourish more with the 1-2-1 attention provided by a counsellor. Do feel welcome to contact the 0808 8020 133 freephone or Netline if you'd like to talk about how you're feeling about your recovery, or if you want more information on additional resources like local counselling agencies or online counselling appointments or online group sessions provided by GamCare.

Take care,

Forum Admin.

Posted by: adam123

With bigger stakes, I get excited every week about playing go then come back thinking not going next week then do it all over again. I'll have a think about what I want to do ? Think I need to give up one thing at a time. First poker, then smoking then drinking. I have said this many times now so I wont try and do too much too fast. This week I wont go to poker today, Thursday and see how I feel at the end of it.

​

wow ive just read back diary from 2016 and boy o boy was I struggling!!!!!  roll on to 2020 and not smoked 4 years, not drunk 1.5 years and only gambled 140 pounds in 1.5 years (to put that into context I read I spent 110 pounds between Friday and sunday one week just socially).  Horray it puts everything into context.

You have done really well Adam.

I consider myself very fortunate to share this road with good people like yourself.

Wishing you peace, happy days and fun adventures as you continue on your journey

Stephen x