It got worse before it got better

Hi Lady H...Thanks for stopping by my diary ...You've gone past 2weeks now 🙂

Day by day is my saviour...Just today.

I still get bad days but they are slowly being outweighed by good days....Keep going, there is so much more to enjoy in life...We just need to open our eyes (and close our purses lol) ...

Take care

Mari x

I'm also right behind you or should I say beside you...also fighting but determined to win. I am also sitting in the background reading diaries as I feel the wind is out of my sails after relapsing

Lady H & Katiecoo, don't feel you have to be everywhere, do what works for you but make sure that if you start feeling like it's not working anymore, you try something else, preferably before you cave. I'm not saying it's ok to relapse because it isn't, it hurts but so long as you do something different & never give up on giving up, eventually you will figure it out - ODAAT

Just a quick check in!! Still GF...yaaay!! Felling really positive...gotta say all bills now sorted....just to finish setting up my dmp with stepchange. Having some real vivid dreams tho....think it's because I'm actually dropping into a proper sleep ....I was obvs so worried and stressed before I wasn't really sleeping properly...got used to how it felt...stressing in my sleep. Weird . Thankyou for your support guys.

Lady H, hello!

I didn't know the ending until the end just now...Keep rooting lady...keep finding and you will get there.....we all work in all sorts of places, and do all sorts of things, and gambling affects us all.....well done for keeping coming back to it..

I wish you every success in the world.

Keep smiling.

P.s I do that calculator thing too, I used to work in a bank as well, in my youth! I am no longer in my youth!! lol

Julie

Hey it's great to see you clocking those days up and sorting your finances out. With regards to the dreams I had a few of them at beginning, they will pass. I can sleep the clock around now, I think my body is trying to claim back all the hours I lost sitting up and hearing the birds sing whilst I tried to win the money back. Any way keep knocking mr g out, best wishes Tyson lol x

Keep going lady h. We're all with you, that's because we've all been in similar situations. Katie coo, emily, silly cow, j125 we're all in this together. It's time to get tough, put the blocks in place and get out of it together. It's in our hands. We deserve a better life, it's up to us to make it X

Wow thankyou you all ...too many names to mention lol!! Update is I'm still gamble free...yaay!! Super cringing every time an advert comes on for Mr G n his mates. Saw a man come flying out of an arcade on the way home....I felt it for him....he was twitching...with a look of o*g I've spent all my money...sweats...I just wanted to shout out to him...but say what..?? Oh btw I looked like you a month ago but in the comfort of my own home?? I dunno...I instantly teared up...wanted to hug him and tell him it can be ok if he wanted it to be....what Mr G does to us!!

Any hooo....last month I basically spent my wage n bill money on Mr G....once you pop you can't stop...stupid plan...spend a little bit win a lot...pfft...worse than ever.

Broke down...once again and let my mum and partner know. Disappointing for them...however I explained I really need their help...check my bank account, have my money, really help me don't just ask...want and see the evidence!! Agreement made.

Rang the missed bills even explained what I had done and wow the help and understanding from them was unexpected. Called Stepchange and changed my DMP to them...first payment next month...most debtors contacted...the power of saying Stepchange...they all were co-operative. I now have one bank account all my money goes in...majority of bills come out on payday (except stepchange which had to be 2 weeks later lol)...then excess transferred to partner who will give me as and when needed. I do have to pay a lil extra on some household bills but once out the way in next 12 months and can plough more into DMP , instead of taking 9 years to pay off...it will reduce to 4!! Have that..so happy!!

So my advice if you will hear it...is please tell someone...tell them the help you need as being a CG you have the skills to make out everything's fine and that it's not that bad but it flippin is!!

It's payday tomorrow, I'm not panicking for a change. Thankyou Gamecare and those who have shown support...it's taken me a good few fails I would not have got this far or be able to start sorting this without you all. It the beginning of the end of that t*****t Mr G... ta laaaa!!

Hey lady h
Thanks for popping over...
The sleep thing was the same for me hun. ...it soon passes. ...
Now I wake up hot and sweaty ...but that's my age lol....
Keep pushing on girl..and I promise you you'll get to a better place x

I'm pushing loxxie imma keep pushing. So payday is over....bills paid apart from 1 which I have rang 5 times since yesterday and no one in the office is answering for goodness sake!!, and 2 which are due in march but can't pay those til then ...urgh (would have normally thought I could make some money from that money via Mr G)....however what I have done is transferred all excess monies to my partner....yaaay!! He will transfer back as and when I need. Bought my two kiddies some treats and junk food for me and the OH to enjoy tonight.

Got a bit of overtime for next couple weeks that should be extra £100-£200. So yes things going well. Ooooh and another thing...paid my friend a chunk towards what I owe her...great!!

Never felt so positive , early days I know but best I've ever felt out of all my dismal attempts to rid my life of Mr G...it can be done peeps but he will be sat on your shoulder forever x

Not going to lie...it's on my mind today as OH is out. However have made plans to see a friend and OH has the money. Good times ahead x

Great to hear you're making such good progress.
Bills getting paid = worries decrease.
Yes it's on your mind. Be gone those soul destroying thoughts, lady h has got a life to live, you have had your time, you gave nothing but misery. You will not be allowed to destruct anymore.
Keep up the positive thoughts lady h. Have a fab day with your friend. You're doing great x

Great read lady h. .
Just keep on plodding on..
Keep busy....and your right....good times in sight.....your good times...x

Lady h wrote:

Good times ahead x

You said it

You CAN do it....and you will.

Supa quick late nite check in....still gamble free 🙂