My Diary of Shame

Well done on your 400th day.

Stay strong

Thank you for your post on my diary.

Lets get one thing straight here..(no pun intended!)..

For the record, I am a 100% Hetrosexual Male. A Man. A geezer. A bloke. A blokey-bloke even. One of the lads. Do I need to go on??

So anymore of your 'Adrienne' mickey taking and generally questioning my masculinity will be met with extreme force.

I will simply pull your hair and scratch your f*****G eyes out with my long Nailene So Natural false nails!!! as all the other Gamcarians (is that the correct collective for more than one Gamcarer, who knows?) stand around in a big circle shouting...FIGHT,FIGHT, FIGHT, FIGHT....

Got it!!

Hahaha...ohhh this is top post 😀

MIAOW you two ☺ 😀

FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT FIGHT (watch ur nails Adrianne tho 😉 )

Hi ODAAT,

Not used to seeing you on page 3; how are you doing?

I'm still ticking along.

Congratulations on 400 days!

Mm

Hi Sesuo!

No hugs for you cause value my life 😛
...but all i can offer is unconditional support, understanding, honesty and commitment of being your true friend through good and bad...i guess this outweights all the hugs all together! Why - because you are one of the kind i happened to cross paths in recovery & life!

No mrs tt ok - we stand together, never forget that!

Proud of you, looking up to you, have faith in you - BELIEVE IN YOU!!

Lil crazy sesuo coo coo

Hi Juuuune
A bit late with the congrats on the big 400 but got there eventually!
Good to see you not manically replying to every lost soul anymore & taking more time for you (we cant save anyone other than ourselves). Peace seems to have found you

Dan x

400 days and counting well done my friend. Thanks for your post on my diary and continuing support, hope all good with yourself and glad to be in the 3% club along with yourself.

ODAAT wrote:

So, bit late but on Wednesday I had an auction site that must remain nameless bargain delivered...2 parts of a divan base, with drawers & a f*****g heavy mattress that took me 6 attempts & 1 broken picture (not the 'Banksy' print that fell off the wall, sadly, but a magnetic photo that it hit when I lobbed it out of the way) to lug it up the stairs! Now this delivery cost me £40 nearly 40 miles from the posh part of London smack bang in the Congestion zone & not only was I rubbing my hands with glee @ how much less than hiring a van it had cost but I was also chuffed @ the amount of my valuable time I had saved!

I rarely gave my time a precious second's though when I was shovelling first coins into the machines, sprinting to & from the bank, then poking notes in, sprinting to & from the bank, then simply sprinting to & from the counter to hand over a piece of plastic. I do know on occasion my money lasted longer than the usual rates in the car park before it switches across to the 24 hour one, admittedly probably only a few minutes into it & I also know that my car got locked in to the car park one night although my memory of those dark days are fading & I do not recall if it was because the car park had closed or I didn't have money to get it out!

I was going to say today, as well as money in the bank, I have time but now seems as good a time as any to say I won't have that inheritance for much longer! We have managed to purchased a little flat down in Cornwall...A fitting end to money that belonged to relatives where we spent many happy holidays as children! To be honest, I was very uncomfortable with it being available, both ashamed @ what I'd done before (still am) with money & afraid because I still struggle to accept the value of a pound & the NM is a boy. A boy who likes shiny, expensive gadgets & things with engines. A boy who has given a Jet Ski far too much consideration! A boy who bought a motor bike & came home with a new bike magazine to look @ better bikes! If that's what normal people do with money, I don't want to be normal, I'd also be very surprised but I harp back to the age old question what is normal!

We are already busy eating spam sandwiches for lunch so we can start paying money back but once the sale goes through there'll be the expense of furnishing it (18 stone (of pure muscle I am assured, I have my doubts) plus 10 ish stone can't sleep on air bed for too long) & bills to boot. I know it's early days but instead of thinking I have to go out & win money to pay for this, my mindset has shifted! I am relieved to be back in debt & perhaps more importantly, I know that there are absolutely no spare pennies to throw away anymore! I am also embarking on a dream that I never knew I had! Just like everyone who has written before about the riches of recovery, I hope no-one sees this as a boast & understands that this is a share to prove that anything is possible when you commit to recovery!

Time to take action - ODAAT

Like day@atime says glad your not replying to every reply but given its your 400 days took me a while to find your last post.

Short and sweet. Congratulations and keep those days coming!!

A short but sweet one from me too as we're down @ the bolt hole & there literally is no signal anywhere...No bed, nothing to sit on, no fridge, nothing other than what we bought with us & a free bottle of wine (corked, no opener probably) that the Estate Agent gave us & my heart actually feels like it's beating out of my chest! I noticed the machines @ the service station (the game responsible for most of my damage advertised in technicolor) & I can honestly say I had zero desire! Life's goooood 🙂

Hey Junie, get you, down @ the bolt hole lol..when stuck in a predicament like that I always think what would Ray mears do??..no bed, no chairs, no fridge...then it dawned on me ...push the cork 'in' and send NM to B&Q for a couple of deck chairs..well we have to get our priorities right Juuuuune ;-))

great to hear your 'zero desire' to return to the bad old days....wish I could say the same....I'm still gamble free but not 'urge free' yet :-/ ..have a great weekend and keep reaping the rewards that abstinence brings..OAU..the Ginger one x

Luv that junnieee at the bolt hole lol, am sure it won't be long before you find an IKEA and Mr G will hate that .as well as you having zero desires for him :))))

OAU

Blondiee xxx

No bed, chairs, fridge....all perfectly acceptable. But no opener for the wine???? What were you thinking 🙂 I'm assuming you weren't a girl guide in your youth. Although, I doubt that "be prepared" meant always have access to alcohol (and chocolate!).

It's good to hear, but not at all suprising, that those nasty machines hold no sway over you now. You've given Mr. G a thorough kicking.

Have a fab time at the bolt hole.

LBx

Good Morning Juuuuune,

Found you back on Page 3.....ew-er Mrs!!

Thank you for your post on my diary.

Bring the gloves if you must. Side hugs only allowed at present, due to very sore 9" scar in centre of chest!

If only I'd relayed this information to my 7 year-old niece, who is visiting from Australia. Yesterday,she attempted a full on running-jump-cuddle at yours truly....which ended up with my brother berating her for attempting such a manoeuvre on her invalid Uncle. Can't blame her, as she hadn't seen me for 3 years!!

My 4 year-old niece on the other hand, was convinced that my scar would be heart shaped (how sweet!)!! And looked a tad perplexed when I showed her the straight line down my chest.

I've had a word with the neighbours and air traffic control, and you should be ok to land your broomstick in my road. As long as this low cloud clears up by the 28th.

You'll have to e-mail me details of your eta in this area.....

Regards

Terry

Hi ODAAT ! Thanks for your kind words of wisdom , It all feels a bit strange dealing with real money , in the real world !! It's been a while thats for sure ! Can't believe I've been in fantasy land for so long but it feels good to be back !! All good thoughts and wishes to you on your recovery , Take care for now , Alan who will not gamble today

I had no idea that you had an ASBO against your name??.....

Is it an "Ade Stalking Broomstick Order" you have against you?......

.....or maybe you belong to the ......."Anti Sports Betting Organisation"....or even the....

.... "Acutely Stupid Barmy Odaat" brigade! ;0)