Narrow Margin (1990) Starring Gene Hackman

This is something I've been meaning to write about as it's another one that I don't know will resonate with you lovely people in this community. I would love to hear your comments

So, I don't know if this is because I started gambling and got in the grips of it, like many at a young age. It may be that those developing years were hindered but I will never know.

Very much like recovery, my addiction convinced me to stick to the middle of the road. Unlike recovery where the road is wide, my addiction over the years narrowed the road down. What I mean by that is that it reduced my choices in life telling me, I don't do that, don't eat that, don't say that, don't help like that. It was all to keep me trapped and not find something else to enjoy. It just became the norm and the road kept getting narrower 

I know this is going to sound ridiculous, it did to my sponsor but I'm still going with this example as it makes me laugh and there has to be humour in recovery. I absolutely love coffee and I have a favourite brand of coffee shops. I buy one each day, the same decaf latte takeaway. In addiction nothing would allow me firstly to have it sitting in the shop because that ls not what I do and would give me to much time to think. I always drove there and not walked. There are hundreds of items on the menu but I stuck to one, just like the one item of.gambling. It could be 90 degrees outside and I would still by a hot coffee rather than a frappe as that was out of my comfort zone. Doing something different became a fear to an extent and my addiction kept saying l, stick to what you know and don't change anything. It was driving me to give up everything other than gambling.

In recovery, it's been hard to retrain my brain. As far as the above example it took me months to find out I hadn't missed out on the frappe idea but I've tried others that I like and now mix it up. I've tried so many new things I've missed out on. A go on walks with people in recovery and rather than walk in solitude at the back of latch on to one person I talk to everyone.

We've all got the weekend ahead and many aren't walking. If this resonates with you, what ideas have you got to do something different, whatever that may be and however small ?