7 days GF! My partner recently found out that i had been gamling again. She was furious at first but has since calmed down and decided to support me but I feel so ashamed and disgusted with myself for letting her down again. The 2 previous occasions I convinced her and myself that it was just a bit of gambling that got out of control, but I realised a while ago that it was more than that. After the 2nd time tho she said that if it happened again we were finished so I felt i couldn't tell her so I continued to chase my loses as I felt I had nothing to lose. We are working through it and I will be attending my first GA meeting this evening. But I feel sick to my stomach at what I have done again and how I have made her feel. Even tho she wants to support me I wonder if I should let her go as I don't want her to be fretting about the possibility of me relapsing again! I'm sick of being broke and have closed all my accounts and put restrictions on my phone etc, I really want to break this habit before it breaks me! She always wants to discuss what's happened with friends and family which horrifies me, but I feel guilty as she says she needs someone to talk to too. I feel bad enough without everyone knowing my shame. Sorry, im ranting but I feel so lowÂ
Hi Teddy
Well done for coming on here. It's not easy with everything going on. Glad to hear you are going to GA. Stick at it, I go to three a week and have turned around 44 years of gambling into six months (next week) bet free. In GA there is an opportunity to do the 12 steps which is amazing.
Have you got the blocks in place to start with ?Â
Can you let your partner look after your money or look at your banking app and get receipts for everything ?Â
If you talk to the advisors on here you can get some counselling which really helps.
It's all about rebuilding your life to enjoy the normal things and then you have no need to escape to gambling.Â
Always here if you need to ask any questionsÂ
Hi. Well you've done the right thing being honest here. Denial is a big part of the addiction and the little voice that says let's try have a little shot to see if we can get a win. It always ends up in us having nothing but problems. I'm in deep at the moment but keep faith we will all get free.Â
Dig in. You got this. Keep being honest my friend and keep helping others too.Â
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