Hi,
My gambling addiction was all online. Didn't feel as if I was betting with real money, all on credit card, chasing and over the years accumulating thousands of debt. I'm a compulsive gambler who cannot gamble again. I said yesterday in a post once all my debts are paid off this will be a very testing time for the addict in me, but I'll face that day in 3-4 years time. You've already mentioned this as a potential weakness in yourself, is this what's happened in the past? Pay off some debt then become confident of betting again? Many addicts think like this but many more fail than are able to control their old addiction. I remember my first GA meeting the guy who hosted the meeting said "you'll never be cured" I thought these were very harsh words but now 6 months down the line I realise it's the truth. I don't want to gamble again. You need to cement this into your mind, if you truely want to stop. There's no clean slate, there's no second chance. You've got to change your lifestyle. Think of all the times we have all spent gambling. Wasting our lives, causing upset to family and also ourselves, all the lies and deceit.
Your opening post is written with a lot of feeling, heart and pain. I'm hoping this time around you can combat this awful addiction and stay in control.
You've had some great advice on this page. I hope they make you stronger.
All the best.
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