Thought i would write this blog as at present feeling very down and low
I am 29 and just qualified as a nurse and have been gambling really heavy for the last year are so, proberly £4000 - £5000 down. Student loans and now my wages are getting seriously effected. Yesterday i lost £500 in the space of 5 minutes online roulette. Chase chase chase is what i do and cannot seem to stop once i start. I Was doing well but never self excluded from a certain website and bang, that was that. The trigger i think was a hangover and boredom. Feeling terrible at minute as going to struggle with bills this month and the lies for borrowing are continuing.
Been reading a few forums and its a little consilation to hear peoples struggles knowing i am not alone. I am going to attend meetings again and promise myself this time that is the finish of the horrible addiction.
I work in a job where boredom and temptation is really high. I am going to buy some books, dvds and computer games to try keep my mind active. I know i have no excuses left anymore and understand deep down if i dont walkaway now i never will.
Today is my first day at not gambling and i will take each day as it comes but going to give it my all.
Best times of my life were GA when i was clean. Great peace of mind...at ease...sleep was good...worries were at lowest. However been over a yr since i was there and been on/off gambling and gambled myself into trouble as you cannot win in the long run!! You have a good job soon...get to GA again..as will i and perhaps its time to say bye-bye to the love of our lives...but also the poison
Thanks for your comment Justjoseph. I will deffo return to the GA meetings as have now realised this is the only way forward.
Cannot possibly feel any worse than i do at present, but its been 24 hours since i last bet, so thats a start........
Well done Graeme2015, every day is an achievement. You will feel so much better next week , next month, next year. Time is a great healer. Keep going and make yourself proud.
Thank you Jasminegolf, i will keep going and one step at a time
Well done mate
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