Day One

Well charlie ive read your diary from scratch and im impressed how you havint wilterd keep it on going

Day 39- job one down, off to job two. Feeling abit tired, but that's nothing compared to how I would of felt if I'd of gambled all month, so I can cope with abit of tiredness! 🙂 Loving the days stacking up, really good for me to see it in front of me. 40 days tomorrow and I can't blooming wait! Going to make this weekend so fun for my lovely niece and nephew and I can't wait to see their gorgeous smiles! Absolutely, worth everything to see them happy and healthy, totally beats sitting in front of a computer for 6 hours!!! Well best move myself for work, good, productive day again. 🙂 Happy Weds evening all! Cx

I have also got in contact with a company to do some volunteer work within the community, 1 night a week and perhaps one day at the weekend...needs to be confirmed yet. But looking forward to helping others less fortunate than myself x

Day 40-yippppeeeee! Feels so good to be at 40days gf. Next target 60! Just worked out that by Christmas I'll be over 100 days gf (hopefully!) what a Christmas present to myself!! 🙂 Can't wait to finish tomorrow. Working again tonight, but got a good weekend planned! A few drinks at my friends tomorrow night and cooking tea, then a weekend of Halloween fun! 🙂 cx

Day 41-Thankgoodness it's here, a weekend of no work!! Just got in, so quick shower and to my friends for few drinks and we are going to cook (saves abit of money) lol. Not a late late night though as busy weekend, which I've looked forward to all week! Happy Friday folks! C x

Hey charley..
Mahoosive well done on the 40 plus days....you've done so very well love....and beleive me....it only gets better....enjoy your weekend off.....go and have fun girl.....you deserve it !
X

Day 42- Thank you loxxie much appreciated! Fab day with family. Getting ready for bed now, as absolutely shattered!! Lol. Cx

Day 43- splendid weekend!! So much family love this weekend and I've truly put 100% effort in,..I know I should always, but I know full well over the years I've barely put effort in and I still seriously kick myself for how much I've missed out and been missing out on!! Feels good to feel shattered through fun and not staring at a screen for 10 hours!! Truly loved this weekend of just pure fun, kids bring so much love and don't need/want you to buy them things, they were so happy I was spending my weekend with them. 43 days ago, this day wouldn't of even of been possible because I wouldn't of even considered/planned this weekend because I was far to selfish, and that makes me feel sick at the thought of not putting my family first! I have a flipping lot to make up, but I'm really appreciating life right now, so I will try my best to try and fill those gaps I've left over the years! However, my heart still weighs very heavy at all I have missed out on with my family. Strange feelings tonight, feel good, but sad too at thinking back to what I've missed. Cx

Day 44-morning diary, had a good sleep after a very busy weekend. Working later today, so a few jobs to do around the house to keep me busy. Another week to smash through and I'm ready for it! Happy Monday folks. Cx

Hi Charley.

Thanks for your message. Great to read how well you are doing!

Take care.

Dave X

Hi Charley,

Thanks for the supportive message. Hope you are doing well.

Thanks

Hey Charlie..glad to see you had such a lovely weekend with family...look at the difference in you in the last 40 odd days....great isn't it... just doing the normal things in life....x

Thank you all for your lovely messages. Day 45-evening. Just sat down and had chance to write properly in here. Never to be honest did I think I'd get to day 45, it seemed such a struggle to get to 10 days in the beginning. Day started off well, but random urges today. I know I've got such a stressful, hectic week ahead next week and wanted to do something to relax me and that was my first thought! This caught me off guard. ..I looked in my bank and saw I have some money in there and that was it decision made..I have money in my bank because I haven't wasted it on gambling! So that thought was thrown to the back of my mind and off I went to clean the house. Sitting down now, I'm so glad I didn't cave because again, I'd be feeling very different now and my week would of been ruined through disappointment in myself, stress and probably back to zero in the bank! However, it is so hard to fight those urges sometimes, that maybe just one big win...however, again it wouldn't be enough, so I'd only lose in the end! Shower and bed for me, ready to fight another day. Hope you're all staying strong. Cx

Day 46-evening. As urges go, today had none. Productive day, got what I needed done. Time to spend some quality time with family tonight and sort through homeless boxes later. Cx

Keep going the way you are Charley your doing great getting a big number under your belt now which can only be good , the simple things like more time with the family are great and actually being there and listening for achang instead of having one ear on the conversation and your mind on gambling :)) .

Ps If those box's really don't have anywhere to live I've a spare room they could use for a while ? ( Sorry couldn't resist ) ::)) x