Day One

Day 24-pm. Wow, where has the day gone?! Another day gone by and feeling mainly good. However, I feel I am sometimes wishing my life away a little by wanting to hurry pay day along, so I can pay debts off, but I'm trying me very best to just be grateful for the days ahead. Another busy day, always a good thing for me. I've read a few posts in here throughout the day and realised how important it is that we look after ourselves. Like they say, 'a car won't run without fuel!' (Or what ever the saying is) 😉 but meaning we get one body in which we live in and I'm absolutely going to start taking better care of me. Nothing crazy, just simple things: go for a walk, take a nice long soak, healthy foods, bit of exercise, positive attitude towards everything etc. The simple things in life. Today's 'nice gesture' I was walking home from work and there was a man in a wheelchair, I see him often on my way home. However, tonight he was shouting and swearing because his wheelchair got stuck on the curb of the road, a lot of people walked past (probably because he seemed aggressive) but I just guessed he was frustrated as he couldn't move his chair. Now, a few months ago I would of been the same, walked past or walked in the opposite direction...probably desperate to get home and gamble! But today I stopped, spoke to him calmly and told him not to worry, I'll give him a push. He give a little grunt, but didn't say no, so I gave a big push and his wheelchair was back to being able to move. Again, he just grunted a thankyou and proceeded on with his journey. A guy who wasn't far away from this situation (yes, stood and watched) turned to me after and said, 'I wouldn't of bothered helping the grumpy sod!' To which I just responded, 'Well Sir, we are all human and have bad days, perhaps he was just having a bad day!' And walked home with a slight smile on my face. For the rest of my walk I thought about how many times I've probably walked past someone in need of help and not even realised! How many people are suffering and dealing with things we no nothing about. He might of been a bit grumpy, but he might of been in pain, lost someone,may have been told some awful news,- struggling with anything, he may of even been struggling with gamble, who knows, but reminded me not to judge, as we don't know what that person is going through. I find Life is much better when we help each other. Night all. C x

Fantastic post Charley!!! Gambling puts that mist in our heads and clouds normality of being human... now the mist is clearing you're seeing clearly again. Great to help that guy out. Really great post.

Day 25-Am. Another busy, long day ahead, but keeps my mind active and my hands busy. Will write in later. C x

Day 25-pm. Job one finished, quick shower and change and off to job two. To be honest feel shattered at the moment and could do with an early night, but missing a shift will equal a missing wage, so no time to whinge I guess. I'm thinking of the weekend, simple family activities to look forward to that don't cost a fortune. My head has been that full with work stuff lately but really much chance to think about gambling, which is obviously a good thing. However, I'm not niave to think I won't ever think about it again, as I know u most certainty Will, but for now I'm loving my head but being scrambled by gambling. My good day for the day will come later, when I get home from my work. My friends birthday tinier and I used to always libr baking cakes/cupcakes, but another thing that got put to the side. We don't usually buy presents for each, but she had spilt with her husband a few months ago and it will be her first b-day in her own, so I'm going to make her a cake. Good day so far C x

Hi , i have left everione donw last night i have gambled but i did stop after loosing £90.00 , i have felt horrible after , this morning i feel even worse , i have to stop, this will stop i have to be strong .i have to regain control of my life.

Day 26- quick check in (soooooo much work to do) feeling happy. Cx

Sorry about your relapse Paulo, sadly it happens, but you stopped eventually because you knew you had to. Have you got blocks in place, a couple of times I've felt weak, but not been able to gamble thankfully coz of blocks in place. Take how you're feeling now and use that as strength to not feel this way again. Take Care Cx

I can see you smiling charley ...
Keep poodling on my love ....your doing great x

Wanted to say well done on your 26 days Charley , keep up the good work 🙂

Day 26-pm. Job 1 finished...Totally shattered today if I'm honest, but job 2 to go to soon! I'm reminding myself I can have a lie in (hopefully) on Saturday! 🙂 Good deed for the day, cake delivered to my friend..she loved it, but technically that was yesterday's good deed, so I won't count it today. So thought the day is getting on and I haven't really gone out of my way for someone. Anyway home time arrived, looked over at one of my colleagues and he seemed rather stressed. I asked if he was ok, he said he'd missed his bru break coz he was on the phone and the boss won't let him go and make one now. I just smiled, walked off put my coat on the chair, went and made him a bru and got him a choccy biscuit out of the tin. Went back, placed them on his desk and said enjoy. He gave a huge smile and said, 'you've saved my life!' Now think that was a slight exaggeration, as I only made him a bru, ha ha, but at least he was happy. It took less than an extra 5mins on my day, so worth it to see his smile! Cost nothing either. I still beat myself up a little as these things are so simple and easy to do for other people, but again a few months ago if I'm honest, I probably wouldn't even of asked if he was ok, let alone make him a bru! How awful!! The clear head is a blooming wonderful feeling and I'm so very grateful for it, long may it last! Happy Thursday evening all. C x

Day 27-pm. Thank goodness this week is over, exhausted! But another week I've made it through 🙂 so I'm happy about that. Not much planned for tonight, relax and regain abit of energy, so I can make the best out of the weekend ahead..without any work!! 🙂 I haven't especially gone out of my way tonight, but decided I'm going to be kind to myself tonight, a soak in the bath, perhaps a glass of wine and just time myself without thinking things over too much. My plan tomorrow is to pop into town for a few food bits, I'm going to buy a couple of extra bits and take them to the food bank, nothing major, but suppose it's better than nothing. Enjoying doing things for other people. Hope you're all feeling strong. C x

Glad to see your doing well Charley - keep going! X there's nothing better than having a bit of 'me' time to relax

Thank you for your lovely comments.

Day 28-am. Wow, what an amazing sleep I had!! Asleep as soon as head hit the pillow and didn't wake until about an hour ago! By far the best sleep I've had in a long long time! Most defiantly needed it! Set me up for a good day now 🙂 my friend has just text me and asked me to go for a coffee in town and a catch up, so that's made my day as we haven't seen each other for a while. Still doing ok with the budget, won't go over board with the coffee and will get a small one, as I still want to buy a couple of things for the food bank today. Happy Saturday everyone. C x

I've been thinking whilst walking around town, picking up a few bits for the food bank. I'm going to start with the Chrismtas box appeal and homeless box appeal for Xmas this year. My life is far from perfect, but is fixable and there are so many people out there, who don't have that opportunity to better themselves. So let the boxes begin. Feels so good doing things for other people. Really appreciating the simple things in life. C x

Day 29-am. I'm truly shocked I am here. Never thought is make it to day 29. Last night I did have another urge, which just reminds me I need always be on guard. I logged on to yahoo to check my emails and an advert came up of one of my favourite slot games and the urge was very strong seeing the reels spin!! They shouldn't be allowed to advertise on everything!! All I wanted to do was check my emails and it left me on edge the rest of the day! However, again huge thanks to my blocks in place I couldn't gamble. The blocks in place have saved me a few times already. If I didn't have them in place, I would be waking up today feeling very different! Anyway back to being positive, I spent yesterday with family, bought a few food bits of shopping and bought my extra for the food bank. Spent an extra couple of pounds on starting my homeless box for Christmas, this made me feel excited that I'm going to help someone a little this Christmas. Today's plans, I'm not to sure yet, just enjoying a coffee and being able to take my time with it instead of rushing for work. Ha. Hope everyone else has stayed strong this weekend. Much love C x