New diary, fresh start

So this year is nearly over, and what a year its been,many relapses had but I'm learning from them each time. I'm a million times better mentally and in turn I'm no longer needing to escape to gambling. I won't say next year il have a gamble free year, as much as I'd love to, we don't know what life has to throw at us, so il continue to take one day at a time like I am doing and try stay strong if urges come knocking.

I'd like to thank gamcare staff for there support, not only for this year but the last few years, thankyou.

Also I'd like to thank my peers on here to, stay strong.

Happy new year to all and il speak to you in 2023 ??

A blast from the past joined chat tonight and if that person happens to come across my diary, I want then to know there not alone. If ever you need to talk, come to my diary, I'm happy to talk and support you. You supported me so much in the past, I'm so greatful for that. Be strong, you can do this, your not alone xx

You are absolutely immense Stace, don`t promise yourself anything just do your absolute best.

Its so good to see after the time and effort and struggles you have put in now reaping the rewards, long may it continue!!

You are absolutely immense Stace, don`t promise yourself anything just do your absolute best.

Its so good to see after the time and effort and struggles you have put in now reaping the rewards, long may it continue!!

Hi,

Just wanted to say thanks for your kindness on chat tonight. Sisters twin came with me today to help with clearing out. Relationships been frosty over the years ( all my fault ) but went to the trouble of digging out an old lovely photograph & having it framed for me. Who knows maybe something can be salvaged I do hope so & wish I could have lead a different life.

Small Steps

Al

So sorry lids/Al only just seen your messages, not been on my diary. 

Thanks for post lids, hope your doing OK

Al I'm always here. Stay strong 

Stace x

Hi Stace u left just as i sent a message..... I'd like to say it's not about how many gamble free days youve amounted its about the fact that each day you wake up and try to not gamble (a day at a time)...... I know you said about ending it all but i know deep down you know you're stronger than that......If there is more outgoings than incomings stepchange could be a good idea but speak to gamcare chat line for advice first and to talk about your mental well being..... i know like me youve been through mental episodes last year so it's really important to get it out in the open with your partner so they can support you (don't be alone), you know they will support you thru it.....

Remember life is far more improtant than any financial figure dont you 🙂

Keep up your previous momentum its just a blip...

Ill allways be here

Adam xxx

I hope you are looking for the help you need, dont get down, keep doing what you've done so well of late.

A blips a blip its how you handle it that counts.

You have done extremely well, realize that and take the pat on the back you deserve.

You are strong, and you will find that positivity again. Just gotta roll through that sticky patch and then come back better and stronger!!!  (and YOU will)

You can do this Stace.

Professionals have knowledge use them and learn from them.

Are you up for it?

Hello Stace,

Haven't been on chat for a couple of nights just too much to do re Late Sister. However something tells me the wheels have came off temporarily. Maybe you're thinking X amount of GF days wasted. personally I've never been a fan of day counts. The one thing we all have in common is that it can happen to anyone of us. It's more about how we bounce back.

I hope you got through your driving test & hopefully passed ( I failed miserably at 
1st attempt but passed 2nd attempt back in 1982 ). We're all human & sadly humans screw up & make mistakes from time to time. For an addict it's not so much about mistakes, but how we deal with them & what we learn from them. Choices are 1 of 2 lie down & die telling ourselves we're hopeless addicts or dusting ourselves down & convincing ourselves that addiction isn't gonna ruin our future.

Look back on the previous few months with pride, kids presents sorted by early December, new home with space for all, improved relationships & someone who's spent the last few months thinking about others futures rather than your own. Move on from this blip, take stock of how you felt a few days ago & the infectious optimism you felt. When you've done that ask yourself was every gate bolted ?. did you put every block in place to prevent relapse. Sometimes honesty is a bitter pill to swallow. Where there's an addict there's temptation but through time we learn how to deal with it.

Don't dwell on what GF days have been lost. I started gambling in early teens & almost 5 decades went by, what seems in hindsight to be in the blink of an eye. What becomes of year 2023 is in your hands & a massive responsibility are you ready for this challenge ?. Lick your wounds. get back on the forum & forget about day counts. I really mean it when I wake up & tell myself Just For Today every day is day 1 for me. 1 horse race, 1 gamble could spell disaster for me. Over 4 years GF yet no further away from the tipping point that brought me here in the first place.

Best Wishes

AL

Stace,

Can't get it out of my head something you said on the chat recently. Making your new home a GF home, what a project, what an ambition, what a dream. Achievements are built on dreams & ambition so go for it. Let no-one convince you can't achieve great things & turn dreams into reality.

Best Wishes

AL

Thsnkyou Al, I'm determined to keep my new home a gamble free home. This is a fresh start for me and my family and I won't let myself or them down ?

So continuing my gamble free journey and it feels good. My mental health is the best its ever been. I'm actually genuinely happy not just faking it. I viewed house last week and I love it. Its a big 4 bedroomed new build house, a fresh start for me and my family. Should be ready to move in in Feb ?

My partner having full financial control is really helping me and feels like a huge weight is lifted off my shoulder. Weve been able to go shopping and buy things for the new house and I'm going out for lunch Friday. 

Things are going really well and I'm happy

Stace,

This is it, a great opportunity & you can do it. Don't let your new home be infected with addiction.

Best Wishes

AL

Hi all, somethings happened in my life thats knocked me of track and I need time to recover and heal. I will be back in a month or so. Take care all. ?

I've lost my partner because of this addiction. Take it from a struggling mum of 5, stop now before you lose everything like I just have