Hi Deb66,
My gambling addiction sounds so much similar to yours.
If you read my thread you will see the destructive path that gambling leads to.
I am somebody with a responsible job/career, a lovely house, a loving husband and the best supportive family in the world, yet I was prepared to risk all of that with the vile greedy and sordid indulgence of gambling with both on-line and land based casino slots.
The amount of money I have lost is astronomical by todays standards and up to 5-6 years ago when I had a fantastically healthy bank balance with no debts, I spiralled out of control and landed myself in the most awful levels of debt to family, the bank and pay day loan companies and I like alot of other people on this site am on a debt management plan. However, after admitting that I have an illness as a compulsive gambler (which we all are on this site) I am now at the point where I realised and accepted the extent of my problem and sought professional help.
It is impossible to try and beat this addiction single handedly and you have to put so many things in place if you truly want to overcome and recover from this illness.
I have self excluded from all local and national casinos indefinately, (this makes it virtually impossible to rejoin) I have installed K9 on my pc, I have blocked all internet access on any other contraptions i.e. phones, Ipad, smart TV etc and I attend GA (which incidentally took alot of courage) and to which I am so grateful for the encouragement and support.
I am so much more in control of my gambling, I am still in early days of recovery however the motto from GA is to take one day at a time.
Life is so much easier and peaceful without gambling, and our finances are starting to look up. It has taken alot of time and hard work to pay off debts and try to earn the respect of family members who are aware of my problem.
Its early days for you but I wish you a smooth and hopefully uneventful road to recovery, just remember whats gone is gone and we will never recover our losses but we can regain our lives and our self respect again.
My best wishes.
Hope x
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