beating this terrible illness

Dreading the next few hours, it really is ///// or bust!! Got to come clean with my wife and brother, already told my parents. I hate myself for what I have done. I am on day 59 though and it's my meeting tonight. I will give a therapy.....

Hi Jaym

Have fingers crossed for you good luck

Suzanne x

Thanks Suzanne,

Things have worked out ok so far! Told wife and family. Mum coming round tomorrow to go through finances. I will feel relieved when we have done this as I need to pay 2 people off asap otherwise it will not be good for me. Been to GA Meeting tonight and really enjoyed it again. I always take something from these meetings.

Staying strong, one day at a time..

Day 60. Back from the gym and feeling positive. Got some finances to sort out later and all being well I can move on and continue to get better!

Day 61 feeling a little strange, not sure why but am ok! Thinking positive and love my family.

Hi jaym

Well done on coming clean It was one of the hardest things I have had to do to someone and I am sure you felt the same and then the relief afterwards and you will feel strange the strategy of your life has changed you don't have to lie anymore gamble secretly hide money (that we haven't got) everything that was then is different as far as our partners go

We know underneath the awfulness of it all and our partners will never know that

Very well done on day 61 and keep thinking positive and enjoy your family as a new person because you are now

Best wishes Suzanne xx

Thank you Suzanne, you are so right in what you say! Day 62 for me and again it feels strange, as if something is missing which it is, that horrible thing called gambling. I am sure as time goes by these feelings will give away as my brain and way of thinking goes back to normal....

Day 63 and feeling low and so ashamed of how much I have hurt my loved ones! I really have been in a trance, I know and I am sure if I was normal I would never of gone down this route. Sounds daft but I don't know how else to describe it. I am so determined to stop and get my life back on track. The thought of seeing my wife, parents, brother upset because of me, I will not do it to them ever again. Big statement I know but I am for real this time.

Nearly end of another day. To beat this illness you really have to want to do it, otherwise you will end up in the gutter with nothing! Do we really want that? We are in control of our destiny and I know which path I am going down...

Day 64 and I have had a few thoughts today but no I do not want or need to go back there! Its a horrible place and it is simply no way to live. Good luck and keep strong all out there!

Hi Jaym

Very well done on keeping strong and determined

You will win today because you no the score

Best wishes Suzanne xx

Thanks Suzanne. Day 65 today. Just taking one day at a time is working for me. I hate the thought of wasting money these days, I will beat this for myself and family. I hope your well Suzanne and feeling good!

Had some horrible thoughts today of gambling, I hate these! It's the demons trying to unlock the good I have done so for, I will not let them beat me the evil s****!

Day 66

Day 67 looking towards the future and a life without gambling! It is everywhere you look. I will stay strong and nor let it beat me...

Day 68 been to the gym with my lovely wife, really enjoyed it again! In work later today. All things good today and no thoughts.